


Accusations: 24 Reylo Ficlets

by angharabbit



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Drama, F/M, Ficlet Collection, Fluff and Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-19
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-04-04 20:13:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 21,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14027883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angharabbit/pseuds/angharabbit
Summary: I'm back on my bullshit again. Canonverse, mostly Force bond, humour, and a dash of smut.(Now available in Russian, thanks to IlSogno!)





	1. Drunk

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Рейло-фиклеты / Accusations: Reylo Ficlets](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14582169) by [IlSogno](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IlSogno/pseuds/IlSogno)



 

"You're drunk," he observed, watching her stagger through her bedroom door into his chamber. She pursed her lips, confused that the concrete room she shared with Rose had turned into spacious shiny spartan luxury. Sadly it meant her cot was no where to be found.

 

"Through that door," Kylo answered, pointing. He put down his pad and tried to read from her mind what had brought her to this state. She stumbled past him with a sloppy salute, an unmarked nearly empty bottle that smelled like paint thinner and sugar swinging from the other hand.

 

By the time he'd followed her into his bedroom she'd collapsed on his bed. He poured water from his bedside table into a small glass.

 

She raised up the bottle to him in offering.

 

"Wurshurm?"

 

He shook his head no, but took it from her hand and put it out of her reach on the floor.

 

"As appealing as I'm sure Chewbacca's engine still moonshine is, I don't drink."

 

Her mind was wide open to him, conscious but unguarded. Kylo stood over her, beside the bed, skimming her thoughts. They were typical of an intoxicated mind, disjointed and uncontrolled. Amusing if he was just poking around in the person's mind, annoying if he had to actually look for something.

 

"You don't drink either," he confirmed. "What happened tonight?"

 

"Lungshtory." Rey buried her face in his pillow

 

"I have time," he said dryly. "It's not like I was sleeping anyway."

 

"Uuuuuuughgaaaaaawd," she groaned. She was reliving the memory, which played it for him like a holo vid in her surface thoughts.

 

There'd been a party, a celebration for the rebel's new permanent base. She'd had a friend do her hair, borrowed a dress and shoes, and was excited. Kylo furrowed his brow, it shouldn't have surprised him that she'd never been to a social gathering before.

 

Rey was a terrible dancer, but enthusiastic, and by the end of the evening she'd caught the eye of the only man in the room cocky enough to proposition the young Jedi.

 

Kylo felt the muscles around his eyes tighten as he recognized the arrogant pilot he'd once tortured. If it hadn't been justified then, he felt it certainly had been earned now.

 

Dead sober but feeling flattered, curious, and reckless, Rey had let Poe Dameron draw her out of the party into a small meeting room. Sweaty palmed and breathless, he'd taken Rey by the hips and popped her up on the board table.

 

Biting his lips, Kylo focused on the girl in his bed rather than watch the loathsome attempt at coupling she was projecting.

 

"Hereitcomes," Rey said into the pillow.

 

Half-clothed and kissing her under the jaw, Dameron had her legs wrapped around his hips. Kylo could feel the pilot's fingers working her, readying her. He hated him. She had her head flung back, throat exposed, eyes closed.

 

"Fuck, Kylo, yes," she had cried.

 

Dameron stopped and stared at her.

 

Kylo stopped and stared at her.

 

She swung her face to meet Dameron's, shock draining the colour from their cheeks.

 

"No," Kylo breathed, staring at the girl in his bed with disbelief.

 

"No," Dameron breathed, pulling away from her sharply with disbelief.

 

"Why did you say that name?" they asked together, in two different places and times.

 

"Rey, how could you be thinking of that monster right now? How could you," Dameron was at a loss for words, wiping his fingers on the skirt of her dress. Rejection played across his handsome face.

 

Kylo felt a surge of pride, and smiled darkly.

 

Rey had been left alone on the table, legs splayed, underpants on the floor. She put herself back together with as much dignity as she could muster, deciding to see if Rose was ready to leave the party.

 

In the hall she found Poe talking to their group of friends, anger and concern fighting for dominance in his tone. He was telling them about what had just happening, asking their advice whether he should take this to Leia, whether Rey was safe to be with the rebels.

 

"Now there's a conversation my mother would love to have. 'Yes, ma'am, I was finger fucking your innocent young Jedi on your strategy table and she said your son's name'."

 

In her memory, her friends had noticed her standing at the door. Finn shook his head, his horrified disappointment plain. Rose looked speculatively at her, like she was concerned but would hear Rey out later.

 

Rey ran, trying to hold in the powerful feelings that wanted to be expressed through destruction. Chewie found her crying in the cockpit of the docked Millenium Falcon with the bottle in question, and carried her back to her room on his shoulder like a drunken toddler.

 

Except it hadn't been her room once she'd opened the door, it had been his.

 

He listened to her cry out his name over and over in his memory. Once she was sober, he imagined the conversation he wanted to have with her about the incident would be different than the ones her friends intended to have.

 

"Sleep," he whispered, using the Force to gently put her out of her misery.


	2. Hurt

"You're hurt," Kylo Ren said suddenly from behind her. Rey twirled around, her hands flying from where they'd been pressed to her abdomen.

 

"No, I'm fine," she growled, turning her back on the unwelcome visitor.

 

"I can feel it," he said tentatively, concern colouring his voice a shade. "You're ill, then."

 

She blushed scarlet to the wall of her room and suppressed a groan.

 

"You are," he repeated, pressing his own hand to his abdomen, "here. You need help, you should go to your medical bay."

 

"Leave it alone, Kylo," she said fiercely, " I'm fine."

 

Her pain was nauseating him, a borrowed twisted feeling in his stomach that burned and twinged. He tried to push a mental wall up between them, but couldn't concentrate.

 

"What is this?" He complained, wishing that the Force wasn't being so generous with their time together.

 

She barked a quick laugh.

 

"It feels like there's a bandage stuck to my organs, and it's being slowly peeled off."

 

"Yeah, that sounds about right."

 

"Can you go take something to ease the pain?"

 

"I have, it doesn't help. You just need to ride it out."

 

"How long?" he asked with frustration, thinking about his schedule. "I can't work like this."

 

"It will only be this bad for a day or two, then not so bad for the next three or four."

 

"Goddammit, what is this?" A fresh wave of sharp rippling pain took his breath away. They both closed their eyes to endure it. "Being shot with Chewbacca's bowcaster wasn't this bad."

 

"You're a little slow, Kylo." Rey's voice was tired, but teasing. "You've lived your life surrounded by men. Any man who'd had a sister or girlfriend would know."

 

The pieces came together. He sifted through his basic medical knowledge.

 

"No," he said flatly.

 

"Yes," she said with a wry grin.

 

"These can't be menstrual cramps. I feel like I'm going to throw up twice and die."

 

"My gift to you, Supreme Leader. See you next moon."

 

\-----

 

"Sir, may I ask why you are looking at me like that?"

 

Phasma's smooth, cool voice betrayed irritation behind her helmet.

 

Kylo quickly averted his eyes from hers. He'd been snooping as they passed in the corridor, and had found her insides painfully twisted like Rey's had been.

 

"Take a half day, captain. Your troops could use a break."

 

Phasma stopped dead, confused? watching Ren sweep past her. She resisted putting a hand to her bloated, chromium covered belly.  A rest would be good.


	3. Here

"You're here," he said unnecessarily.

 

Obviously she was here. She stood in front of him, hands on her hips, in the middle of the star destroyer's hangar. Four troopers behind him awaited orders, blasters ready.

 

"You said you'd teach me, so here I am."

 

He envied her resolute calm. There was no conflict in her, she truly felt this was the right path. Learn from him, live alongside him, and work on turning him. Rey didn't bother hiding it from him, it was all there in her surface thoughts for his perusal.

 

"You go to Snoke first," he explained in an emotionless tone. Inside was a tempest, the edges visible in his eyes when she looked closely.

 

Dismissing the foot soldiers, Kylo escorted her to the throne room with a hand on her back. The warmth of her skin through the fabric was reassuring, and felt daring in his sterile environment.

 

Snoke sat on his throne, radiating self-contentment. Kylo dutifully dropped to his knee, but Rey raised an eyebrow.

 

"So you have brought me the girl, Ren."

 

"Yes, master, she has requested my instruction in the Force."

 

"She has, has she."

 

Snoke stroked his rotting cheek with one long finger, gold robes twinkling in the dramatic lighting.

 

_ "Is there a word for someone putting a great deal of money into looking silly?" _

 

_ "Gaudy, _ _"_ Kylo supplied.

 

"Yes, good," Snoke purred. "Your bond has progressed even further than I'd hoped."

 

"Master?"

 

"You may teach her as long as she is tractable, and you will bring her to me daily for additional tutorial. There is a price, young Jedi."

 

Rey stared levelly at the figure eyeing her up hungrily.

 

"What will you ask of me in return?"

 

Snoke laughed a long, evil, wheezing laugh.

 

"You, girl, will give me a Skywalker child."

 

He paused for dramatic effect, was rewarded with the openly horrified expressions of both of his pupils.

 

"That child's power will be limitless, and I will raise it from the womb, allowing none of the conflict that mars the son of Han Solo and Princess Leia."

 

He raised his arm and pointed at Rey. She gave a grunt of pain as something tore through the skin of her arm, a small implant.

 

"Fill her with Vader's seed, apprentice, as I know you desire to. I care not whether you keep her as wife, pet, or prisoner, but you may teach her the ways of the Force while she incubates my heir."

 

Kylo bristled at the crude command, cheeks red with shame and rage. Rey could feel the thin hold he had left on his temper.

 

"Go now," said Snoke with a dismissive flick of his hand. "And Jedi girl," he said dangerously, "know that I will not hesitate to dispose of you once the child is born if you misbehave."

 

Rey was speechless, and allowed Kylo to take her elbow and march her out of the room. He guided her down corridors that became narrower and narrower until he stopped in front of an unremarkable door in an unremarkable hallway. Keying in a code, the door opened to reveal a basic living quarter.

 

"Well, Kylo, you have everything you want," she said finally, her voice hollow. "I'll be your student, I'll share your bed, and since I would never leave my child, I'll be here for life."

 

He sunk into a chair and dropped his head in his hands.

 

"This isn't what I want, to have you forced into my bed. I want you to come willingly, by your own desire and choice."

 

"And I imagine Snoke will know if we don't."

 

"Yes, he'll strip it from our minds tomorrow, and doubtless we will both be punished."

 

"That can't be fun," she mumbled. Her voice cleared, hard and bitter. Her eyes were dark with anger. "Well, if you're to flood me with  _ Vader's seed _ , better get started."

 

Kylo stared at her aghast as she began to remove her clothes. He wanted to stop her. He wanted to help.

 

_ God help him, Snoke had ruined this for them forever. _

 

\-----

 

Kylo awoke from the dream panting with rage. Snoke was dead. He was Supreme Leader. Rey was not his captive.

 

"Your nightmares are fucked up, Ben," Rey said quietly, perched on the edge of her bed. He was sprawled across her entire bunk, sweaty and large. The blue light of hyperspace shone eerily through the window.

 

"How much did you see," he asked, flinging his arm over his eyes to shield his face from her scrutiny. He tried to reign in his emotions.

 

"All of it? You couldn't just have nice normal sex dreams like everyone else?"

 

"I'm sorry," he barked. "You should know that it's entirely within the realm of possibility that Snoke would have made such a demand of you."

 

"Of us."

 

"Of us," he agreed, acknowledging that he hadn't been a willing participant. "I don't create these horrors out of thin air."

 

Rey reached over and took his hand. Sparks flew in his brain, and he opened his eyes wide against the skin of his arm.

 

"You're your own master now, Ben. He doesn't control you anymore."

 

He made a noise of assent.

 

"Just do me one favour," she asked, a glimmer of humour colouring her tone. He couldn't see, but he imagined she had a tiny smirk. "If you ever hope to actually get inside me, never use the phrase  Vader's seed. "

 

Silence fell heavily in the little room.

 

"Deal," Kylo said hoarsely.


	4. Choke

"You're going to choke," she said, putting a hand on his wrist. "Slow down."

 

He took the grey nutritional unit away from his mouth, wiping his lips with the back of his other hand.

 

"No time," he said, mouth still full. "I have meetings all day, and still need to fit in a training session, an hour of flight time, inspect the new construction in E-sector, and read the reports for tomorrow's summit."

 

Rey gave a low whistle.

 

"So it's all fun and games being Supreme Leader."

 

He glared at her, shoving the rest of the meal unit into his mouth and chewing. The caloric need to maintain his physique was enormous, and he'd been losing weight since he took command.

 

"Give me your Pad," she ordered, plucking it off of his desk. "I'm on watch for the next twelve hours, and I need something to do. I can't do much, but I can take care of reports for you."

 

"Who said I wanted you to have access to all that First Order information?"

 

She tapped the side of his head.

 

"Either way, I'll end up being able to access it eventually anyway."

 

He scowled a moment, the clock telling him that he should already be on his way to the board room to hear the latest from finance.

 

"Take it," he said, standing up. Rey looked him up and down, and brushed the crumbs from his stark black coat. She pushed the hair from his eyes, and smoothed out the shoulders of his cape.

 

"There, now at least you're a presentable dictator."

 

He wanted to rise to her bait, but there was no time. Making do with a rude finger gesture, he swept out of his office.

 

When the blessed moment arrived that he could strip down and pick up his lightsaber in his personal training room, she reappeared.

 

"Hello pectorals," she greeted cheekily. He repeated the rude gesture without breaking from his warm up patterns. Rey watched him move from form to form with admiration, and Kylo knew he was showing off, taking more care than usual to hit each stance crisply, flowing out of each one gracefully.

 

"What would you like first? Facilities, finance, personnel, allies, economics, incidents, daily logs, galaxy news, the rebels, sports, or weather?"

 

"You read them all?"

 

"Most were deeply boring, but when you read between the lines there was some interesting information."

 

"Surprise me," he said, activating a droid who began to fire randomized blaster shots at him. She raised an eyebrow as he caught and diverted each one. The droid increased the speed and intensity, perspiration shining on his face and the back of his neck.

 

Rey focused on his mind, trying to figure out how he accomplished such an unbelievable task. If he knew she was in his head with him, he didn't push her out. He diverted a blast and she caught it, holding the barely perceptible bar of light with her mind the way she'd hold a soap bubble with her fingers.

 

Distracted by her new skill, the next shot hit him in the hip with a smoking sting. He threw out his hand and switched the droid back off with the Force.

 

"Warn me next time," he asked, rubbing at the circular burn hole in his high black trousers. "They're not full strength but they still hurt. If you're not going to help me with reports then at least let me focus on getting everything done."

 

Rey apologized, contrite if amused. She described the salient points for each report, directly referencing the data when he had questions or needed specifics. He was fascinated by what she found most interesting, and how she prioritized differently than he did.

 

While Kylo listened he moved through his routine, going from high skill to low skill exercises. When he was dripping sweat andgrunting through countless repetitions of basics like push-ups, she stopped talking.

 

"Something wrong?" he panted, arms on fire.

 

"The only one left is on the Resistance. I wasn't sure if you'd trust my summary."

 

He let himself fall onto the floor, considering while he looked up at the support beams above him.

 

"Read it to me," he decided.

 

"The whole thing?"

 

"I'm going to head to my TIE. You can read to me while I do my flight exercises."

 

She privately doubted he'd be recovered from this work out to fly to the best of his ability, but when fifteen minutes later found her sitting back to back with him in the prototype light fighter, she felt exhilaration flow through him. There was no real effort involved here, if anything it renewed him.

 

Raising the Pad up to read, she tried to focus on the words while he swirled and dove them around in wild arcs and tight spins.

 

_"I'm going to be sick if I try to read,"_ she said, annoyed. _"You're on your own."_

 

She vanished, back to her duty wherever the Resistance was hiding. He doubted that information was in the report he'd still have to read.

 

Calling his squadron to scramble to their fighters, he took his pilots through a punishing series of exercises. The more he pushed them out here, the better chance they'd survive encounters with X-wing pilots like that arrogant Dameron.

 

\-----

 

_"Ah, I've heard about Hux,"_ Rey said with enthusiasm.

 

She'd popped into his meeting, sitting in the formerly vacant chair next to him. It didn't appear anyone could see her, but he couldn't outwardly acknowledge her presence.

 

Hux had his hands behind his back, standing in front of a star map where several plants had been circled in red, explaining something.

 

_ "His hair is so orange. I've never seen such a colour." _

 

Kylo suppressed any sign of amusement, wishing he had his helmet to hide behind.

 

She listened to Hux ramble a few minutes.

 

_ "God, he's a self-important ass, isn't he?" _

 

Kylo made a slight noise in the back of his throat, trying not to smile or laugh. Hux derailed for only a moment before pushing on.

 

_ "Finn told me once that he went to mop out a communications closet, and he found Hux inside with a radar technician. She was calling him her muffin, her carrot muffin, while he-" _

 

Kylo stood up, schooling his face to calm. Everyone else stood up.

 

"There's a disturbance in the Force," he announced, then made a sweeping exit.

 

Finding the first empty room he came across, he sealed the door behind Rey.

 

His expression cracked, laughter bursting out of him for the first time in countless years.

 

It was a good sound.


	5. Reckless

"You're reckless," Kylo stated coldly from behind her.

 

Rey sat alone at a table in the mess hall in the middle of the night, toying with her empty plate, trying to decide if she was still hungry after a long shift. There were countless repairs needed on the X-wings returned from yesterday's sortie. She'd climbed out of her own fighter, jittery from near misses, energetic from survival, and immediately grabbed her tools.

 

She turned to face the familiar black clad spectre.

 

"Evening, Kylo," she said calmly, despite the furious intensity in his eyes.

 

"I just saw the report from the skirmish near the Alderaan system's asteroid field."

 

She had never heard his voice so threatening, but it didn't concern her.

 

"Did you," she replied, turning back to her plate, turning her back on his dramatics.

 

"You're flying an X-wing against my TIE pilots now? You're a novice, you could have been killed," he practically spat.

 

"Red 4, at your service," she said with a mock salute and a patient smile. "And thanks to you I've got quite the skill bank when it comes to flying a fighter. Did you know the TIE and the X-wing have the same set of controls?"

 

"I refuse to see your name on my daily casualty report," he said, slamming his hand down on the table beside her.

 

She stood up, not realizing he'd closed the distance, and found herself nose to chest with the wrathful young tyrant.

 

Reaching up slowly, she gently cupped his cheek. His mouth fell open a trace.

 

"I know you're scared for me, but in this, I'm not yours, I'm mine," she said. "And I've never asked you to stop flying with your unit."

 

"And what if next time it's me firing the missiles that take you down? What if I don't realize it's you, or can't protect you from the others?"

 

"Then I die, Kylo, this is a war!" Her temper flared, and she pulled her hand away. "Sometimes what I'd like to do is run away with you and forget none of this is happening, but it is, and I can't."

 

That seemed to break some control mechanism inside of him. She felt a wave of distress, then he vanished.

 

\-----

 

He knew it would come to this.

 

Kylo's  _ Silencer _ looped on the edge of the battle, followed by Rey's X-wing as they argued.

 

_ "You're going to get yourself killed, go back to your destroyer,"  _ he demanded, fear tasting like blood in the back of his mouth.

 

_ "I could say the same to you," _ Rey yelled,  _ "you're like a giant target in that fancy TIE." _

 

She fired a few shots at him, deliberately aiming wide, and he easily maneuvered out of danger.

 

_ "You're outnumbered, there's no way to win this. My ship will have charged its cannons by now." _

 

_ "Kylo, I'm telling you, you need to go back, you're getting too close, we have a -" _

 

Her thought was cut off as she watched in horror as the  _Silencer_ took fire from the cloaked heavy fighters he had unknowingly encroached upon. One wing dissolved in flame, and he spun wildly, fire and electricity visibly crackling around the pilot's main unit.

 

She could tell he was unconscious but alive, the silence in her mind shocking. Clamping down panic, she flung out her hand and wrapped his ship with the Force.

 

Moving the entire disabled, burning fighter with her mind, she dragged it through the battle, around skirmishes and explosions. She gasped with effort, knowing that she was a easy target for the enraged TIE that zoomed her way. Only when Kylo's ship had been floated right into the hangar of the nearest destroyer did she release her control on the Force.

 

"Red 4, what are you doing?" yelled Red Leader. "MOVE."

 

Red Leader swooped in front of her, firing on the TIE, making them scatter. Before they could regroup, she was gone, rejoining her squadron as they made a pass at a First Order bomber.

 

_ "Be okay, Kylo, be okay," _ she thought desperately to him, knowing he couldn't hear her.

 

\-----

 

Once her feet hit the hangar floor on the rebel ship, Rey ran for a private space. She knew she should go to her commander for debrief, but this was priority.

 

Slamming the door behind her and locking it, she closed her eyes and concentrated on her other half.

 

Beeping filled the air around her, bright lights, and she threw herself towards it. The smell of bacta and sanitizer surrounded her, and finally she saw him.

 

Kylo had been cut out of his clothes, had an oxygen mask strapped to his face, and was being carefully inserted into a full body bacta tank. The movements of his body in the liquid were eery, like seaweed under the surface waving with the tide, his hair rising around him like a sea urchin, a spiky black halo.

 

Rey put her hand to the tank, feeling for his mind. There was a thick layer between them that had a chemical tang to it, like she could taste the sedative the droids had given him.

 

There had been a time she would have been thrilled by this isolation, by having the privacy of her own mind back, of severing her connection to the seductive prince of the dark side who called her to his side.

 

She debated trying to burn away at the sedative, of forcing him to wake, but as she examined his injuries, she dismissed the idea as selfishly cruel. He was badly burned all over, by fire on the outside and electricity on the inside. His brain was concussed, and she could see purple bruising under the skin where he likely had organ damage.

 

The body she had longed for was broken.

 

A current ran through her mind.

 

He was fighting the sedation.

 

Kylo's eyes snapped open in the tank, and locked on hers. She saw the hellscape of fire and burning plastic that had been the last images he'd had before his brain had been switched off by the impact. Pain flooded her, raw and terrifying.

 

_"Sleep!"_ she shrieked, throwing her hands to the tank. A tremor ran through him as the Force command knocked him out, his eyes drifting shut.

 

Rey discovered over the next hours that Kylo needed to be Forced back to sleep regularly, his mind fighting for dominance over the drugs and her instruction. She listened to the medical droid report to General Hux, a laundry list of injuries.

 

Responsibilities caught up with Rey, and by the next morning she realized that she had to return to her side. On the rebel base she bathed, ate, pretended to have slept, and checked in with her commander.

 

Kylo was such a skilled pilot, it honestly hadn't seemed like a reason to be concerned for his safety. He'd flown countless sorties against the Resistance, never taking serious damage. It was his distress for Rey that had led him into danger.

 

She refused to feel guilty.

 

Mid-afternoon she began to hear murmurs in her mind. She paused from where she'd been riveting a new panel onto the damaged wing of a fighter to listen. It sounded like someone speaking through a thick wall.

 

She worked through the day pretending she wasn't sick with worry, pretending her mind wasn't filled with someone else's drug and pain induced mental fog.

 

_ " Rey _ _,"_ she heard clearly while she ate her dinner in the mess hall. Her fork fell to the tray with a clatter, breaking the flow of conversation around her for a moment.

 

_ " Rey _ _,"_ she heard again. This time Kylo appeared for a moment, flickering like an old holo vid, grey and weak.

 

"You alright?" Finn asked, concern in his gentle eyes. "You look like you saw a ghost."

 

"Tired," she said, excusing herself. She ran for her room, and flung open their connection.

 

Kylo had been moved to a regular bed, and had fewer drugs running through his system. He didn't appear to be conscious, but he was restless. The medical droids had placed padded restraints on him. Without embarrassment, Rey pulled off his sheet and inspected his healing body. The bacta tank had done a remarkable job, and new pink skin was forming quickly on his terrible burns, some crossing the scars she herself had given him one snowy night.

 

_ There's no doubt I've left my mark on you _ _,_ Rey thought.

 

At leisure with the sight of his bare body, his pale face, she allowed herself to look beyond the damage.

 

He was beautiful.

 

And he was hers.

 

They hadn't talked about it, but she knew it was true. His claim on her was clear, and she was letting herself feel the depth of her claim on him. He'd offered himself to her once, and she'd refused, but she knew the offer stood. His person, his body, his mind, they were hers.

 

She scanned his surface thoughts, helped guide his dreams away from fire and towards images of rest, of calm. She showed him her island, and walked him up narrow pathways that led to breathtaking vistas.

 

She felt his sleep become shallower, his breathing change.

 

"Rey," he said hoarsely, stretching out his bound arm. She took his hand and squeezed, feeling sparks where their skin met.

 

She waited until he was fully alert.

 

"You're alright," he said, relief easing his tense features. "I didn't know what happened to you after I was hit."

 

"You're reckless," she accused.


	6. Late

"You're late," Kylo said, feeling the familiar rush of the Force bond. "I thought we were going to train together this morning."

 

The rhythm of her feet, the sound of each step pounding on dirt was completely unlike the padded metal training room floor he stood on. He felt her exhilarating fear, both flight and fight together.

 

"Need this!" Rey shouted from behind him, plucking the lit lightsaber out of his hands as she passed him, not slowing.

 

He had lowered his lightsaber from where he'd been about to strike the training droid, turning just in time to see her outstretched hand close around the black metal handle. It left his grip effortlessly, surprise her advantage.

 

Standing frozen a moment, empty hand still cupped to grip the item she had absconded with, he watched Rey run into the distance and out of his sight.

 

_What just happened._

 

His lightsaber was well and truly gone. Like an extension of himself, its absence a missing limb. Wherever in the galaxy his attractive nemesis was in reality, so was his weapon.

 

_"Rey, bring that back,"_   he called angrily through the bond. He could sense grunts and exertion noises coming from her.

 

_ "Busy! Either help or shut up." _

 

Attempting to remain calm, he schooled his focus into peering into Rey's present surroundings.

 

An enormous tentacle swiped at him. He jumped away, a stinging pain across one calf telling him he hadn't quite cleared it. The terrible red limb was attached to a massive cephalopod, and Rey was swinging the lightsaber furiously at its toothy middle.

 

_ "Why are you battling a rathtar?" _ he demanded, attempting and failing to freeze it with the Force. Rey hacked off a few of its many limbs, her skill stalling him a moment with pride.

 

_ "Is that helping? Because it's certainly not shutting up," _ Rey shot back.

 

_ "I'm trying," _ Kylo said, tossing his hair out of his face while he clamped down on his temper.  _ Focus on the monster, not the girl. _

 

Blood ran down one of Rey's arms, staining the wraps, and the sight of it fuelled his hate towards the creature.

 

_ Focus. _

 

_ Fooooocus. _

 

_ Foooooooooooocus. _

 

_ NOW! _

 

Rey screamed as the beast exploded, tentacles, suckers, eyeballs, skin and innards spraying everywhere.

 

"You could have warned me that you were going to do that,"  she complained, pulling an eyeball out of her hair with disgust.

 

"I was shutting up so that I could help. Mission accomplished, now given me back my lightsaber."

 

"No, I might still need it between here and the _Falcon_ ," she said resolutely. The connection snapped shut, and Kylo found himself back aboard his star destroyer, sans weapon.

 

XXX

 

Try as he might, Kylo couldn't reach Rey for hours. He began to worry for more than his beloved sword. Had she encountered more of those monsters? Had her wound been poisoned or already festered?

 

He paced the long corridors of the ship, haunting lonely spots that were deserted at night. It didn't help. His body had healed from the fighter incident, but his mind was as broken as ever.

 

XXX

 

"Ben," he heard out of the darkness. He'd pulled up the sheets only moments before, not yet asleep. She was silhouetted by the stars behind her, standing at the end of the bed.

 

"Do you have it?" he asked quietly, relieved Rey was alright. He sat up, making sure everything important was covered.

 

She lit the saber, and in the red glow they could see each other's faces. He felt no fear.

 

"I was thinking about what you showed me, about the night Luke almost killed you in your sleep."

 

"And you decided to recreate the moment for me?" he gestured to her standing over his bed with the sword while he was trying to sleep. Rey was undeterred.

 

"You already had a blue lightsaber, that's what you used to defend yourself. What happened to it?"

 

"You're holding it," he said simply.

 

"But it's red," she said, perplexed.

 

"Now it is."

 

"How did it change?"

 

She sat on his bed beside him unasked, feet tucked under her knees, laser blade precariously close several times to cutting person or furniture. Her hands were wrapped around the handle, turning it slowly, running her fingers over it in a way Kylo found unnecessarily suggestive. He reached over and plucked the lightsaber from her, relieved it was home.

 

"I changed?"

 

Rey's face was completely open, fascinated.

 

"And that changed your kyber?"

 

He nodded, pressing his lips together. It had been a far more painful process than he was prepared to discuss right now.

 

"Kyber crystals can be forced. Mine is damaged, but powerful."

 

Rey reached over close to him to point at the side shafts.

 

"And you added these," she trailed her finger down the clumsy exposed red wire, "and this to try to vent and stabilize it?"

 

"Painted it black too."

 

"Dramatic effect?"

 

"Something like that."

 

"So is it possible for a kyber in that state to what, heal?"

 

Kylo shrugged.

 

"That's not my area of expertise."

 

"I wonder if it's somewhere in the Jedi texts," Rey leaned on one arm pensively, no guile in her thoughts as she examined the defects. She wanted to fix it, it was the mechanic in her.

 

"And what if I like it the way it is?" He let the heavy metal handle lay in his palms, the weight comforting.

 

"You like it even thought it's damaged and unstable?"

 

"I don't expect you to understand that," he said, trying not to sound defensive.

 

"No," she responded, a smile lighting up her eyes, "I can understand liking something like that."

 

Kylo switched off the lightsaber, plunging the room into darkness.

 

_ "I can still tell you're blushing," _ she whispered in his mind.


	7. Happy

"You're happier than usual."

 

"Yes, Supreme Leader, I have excellent news."

 

Hux looked like the ginger cat who'd eaten the canary, smarmy grin ear to ear.

 

The board room was empty after the last of their financial backers had left the destroyer in their expensive cruisers, only the remains of a sumptuous lunch to show they'd been to meet. Kylo sat in his luxurious chair at the head of the table, reviewing his notes over the dregs of a cooled black coffee.

 

_ This can hardly be a good thing. _

 

"I just received notice from Niima outpost that the murderous guttersnipe, Rey or whatever that junior Jedi called herself, has been killed in an explosion."

 

Hux was watching Kylo's face carefully, evidently looking for the impression the news would have on him. One didn't need to be a mind reader to realize the genocidal general was suspicious of what had happened in Snoke's throne room, and the role Rey had played. Kylo assumed the guards on duty that day may have even reported to Hux the familiar, even flirtatious conversation the pair had engaged in when Rey had arrived in the  Falcon 's escape pod, or that he'd dismissed them to ride the elevator alone with the girl.

 

"Oh?" His face was schooled into passivity, trying not to react.

 

"Yes, our patrol spotted her x-wing outside of Niima, one life form confirmed inside. Heat seeking missiles incinerated the entire fighter, zero chance of survival. We're preparing a news brief to broadcast, celebrating the end of the Jedi menace."

 

Kylo nodded slowly.

 

"Belay that for now until we can confirm the identity of the life form. Anyone could have flown that fighter."

 

Hux smirked, betraying an almost pitying expression.

 

"Supreme Leader I know you don't want to believe it, but facts are facts, that had to have been the girl."

 

The condescension would normally have made him want to Force choke Hux back into grovelling, but this particular moment, Kylo was more amused than enraged.

 

"You're that certain it was Rey, Hux. You'd stake your career on it?"

 

Hux preened.

 

"Of course, Sir."

 

"Then broadcast it, and you can wear your victory. Make sure everyone knows this was all you."

 

With a snappy salute, the general sauntered out of the room, his only disappointment that Ren hadn't given indication of a secret relationship that Hux could have used against him. He had a vid to prepare, and send to the galaxy.

 

Kylo waited until the door had shut before he ducked his head under the table.

 

"I'm sorry to hear that you're dead now."

 

Rey shrugged and peered back up at him from where she leaned comfortably with her back against his shins, hidden on the sides with his cloak corners.

 

She scowled around the sandwich she was eating.

 

"That bastard killed one of my porgs. I left him in my fighter, that must have been the life sign."

 

"Need a ride home?"

 

"Nah, if Carrots is broadcasting that to the galaxy someone'll be by soon to pick me up."

 

"Why are you on Jakku anyway?"

 

"I needed to pick up a couple sentimental things from my house."

 

"House is a strong word."

 

"Well, life is better since I've got friends who look out for me now."

 

"Requests?"

 

"Two more of these," she waved the crust of the sandwich, "one of those chocolate things, another dish of the creamy stuff with the sugar crust, and as many of those red berries as you can reach."


	8. Angry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is full of filth and wizard swears.

"You're angry."

 

"You're so angry you're thinking about slapping me," Kylo said aggressively when she appeared in his chamber one night.

 

Fully suited in black cape and cowl, he stepped right into her personal space.

 

"You want to hear the sound it'll make, the crack, feel it up your arm, tingle in your fingers."

 

He took her shaking hand, staring her down with flat black eyes. She didn't pull away.

 

"Go ahead," he encouraged. "You're stronger than you look. It'll hurt, probably bruise."

 

Rey swallowed down the darkness resonating from her core.

 

"I'm angry. That doesn't mean I'm going to try to hurt you."

 

Separating her fingers, he used her index to trace the line of his scar from hairline down.

 

"You've hurt me before. It was a triumph for you, a victory. Remember how good you felt?"

 

The finger disappeared into the shadow of his cowl, but she still felt the hot ruined flesh. He shivered slightly at the touch continued out of sight.

 

"And who said I minded?" he whispered. "Maybe it was worth it."

 

He was so close she had to crick her neck to keep eye contact.

 

"Are you going to slap me, Rey? I won't stop you. It might even help make you feel better."

 

Anger flared through her. She removed her hand and kept them both balled at her side, but didn't back away.

 

"Feel better? You destroyed my ship! Bombed it right on the public landing pad."

 

"Just be grateful it wasn't your beloved  _Falcon_."

 

"You could have killed people."

 

"I knew you were safe."

 

"Stormtroopers chased me through the city for hours!"

 

"You evaded them in the end."

 

"How did you even know I was there?"

 

"Coincidence. I had a meeting on that planet and felt your presence as we landed."

 

Kylo swooped down, gathered her up, and stole an open mouthed kiss. Rey lost herself to it for just a beat before she pushed him away and stepped back.

 

"What the hell, Kylo?"

 

"I thought I'd give you some encouragement to follow through on that slap," he said smugly.

 

She felt the urge for retribution flow into her hand.

 

"No, you want it too badly," she hissed, denying him. "You don't deserve the satisfaction."

 

But then she woke up, the pre-dawn light coming through the tiny window.

 

"You don't get to judge my nightmares as sexually weird anymore," Kylo taunted.

 

Rey had to get her bearings, she'd had no idea she'd been dreaming.

 

The interloper was just in sleeping pants, sitting across the end of her bed so she couldn't extend her legs. Stripped of his imposing garb he should have appeared more approachable, warmer, but he carried his confidence in his skin.

 

She tried to pull the blankets up over her face, but he had them trapped beneath him. Having to make do with covering her face, Rey groaned through her fingers.

 

"I'm sorry you had to see that."

 

He shrugged.

 

"I think we're beyond hiding the fact that we're attracted to each other."

 

Sitting up like the undead from a fresh grave, Rey finger combed her hair out of her face, anxious to not be looking at him.

 

"To be honest," he continued while she fought through her embarrassment, "now I'm curious. What were you hoping I'd do if you'd given in to my deviant request?"

 

"I don't know," she lied quietly.

 

Kylo smirked.

 

"Yes you do."

 

She gave him a frustrated frown, tightening her fingers around fabric.

 

"Can nothing be peaceful with us?"

 

"Go on," he teased, "say it."

 

Rey whipped her pillow around to smack him in the goddamnsmug face, but he caught her wrist. He squeezed it, causing her fingers to flex and drop the pillow.

 

"You wanted to slap me, then you wanted me to ravish you."

 

His intensity was burning away the humour, and Rey lost the rhythm of breathing.

 

Here he was in all his damaged glory, scars and burns, waiting for a sign from her.

 

Rey freed her hand, and summoning all her strength, slapped him so hard his neck carried his head to the side. The pain echoed through the bond. Doubtless he'd still be wearing it tomorrow.

 

Before the recoil had finished travelling up her arm, Kylo had reacted. Launching himself like he'd been spring coiled, she had time to only register his hungry expression before he was consuming her mouth.

 

Months of tension cracked almost audibly between them, their minds a cacophony of overlapping thoughts.

 

Slow it down,  was Kylo's first thought to clear the noise. Pulling back, he surveyed the panting, flushed, tangled mess he'd created. Seeing it coming too late, Rey slapped his other cheek harder than the first.

 

He forced her onto her stomach, straddling her thighs, using his weight to trap her. He let his hand slide down her back over the thin fabric of her tunic, cupping her ass where it cradled his pelvis.

 

"Fuck, Kylo," she gasped. He did a quick scan to make sure she was enjoying the play, and was gratified to find her pleasure.

 

Lowering his mouth down next to her ear, he began to with a voice so low she could feel the vibrations through her.

 

"Do you know how long I've wanted you, scavenger?"

 

An image of the two of them in Snoke's throne room appeared in her mind.

 

"No no, young Jedi, think further back." He pressed his fingers down between where their bodies met. She moaned into the mattress.

 

Images flew before him out of chronological order. The fight in the snow covered woods. Strapped to an interrogation table. The moment they had first touched hands.

 

"Earlier than that," he insisted, reaching under her to palm a breast through her shirt.

 

This time he supplied her an image.

 

Coming around the trees and rocks on a sunny day, already awash with her new but so familiar presence, to see her blaster poised and ready. His prey didn't hesitate as she fired shots that would have found their mark had he not brushed them aside. Beautiful, fierce, brave, and an unexpected challenge even before she'd come into her Force powers.

 

He'd wanted her.

 

He'd taken her then, literally took her back with him into his ship, but he'd quickly learned about Rey. She was not to be taken.

 

But when she gave herself, he knew it would be beyond expectation. He would wait.

 

Now with throbbing through his face and a painfully hard cock, he knew waiting was over. If not now, then soon Rey would be his.

 

From under him she bucked up as he hit a sensitive spot with his finger, almost throwing him off.

 

"Behave yourself, girl," he commanded, giving her a light smack on the bottom.

 

"Let me up," she demanded breathily while he stroked her.

 

"No."

 

"Let me up, I want to touch you."

 

"No. If I let you touch me we'll be fucking within minutes, and I want to take my time with you."

 

"Fuck you, Kylo," she spat out impatiently.

 

"Yes, that's the eventual plan, but first I believe you wanted to be ravished, so it'll be fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, and then fuck me."

 

Rey woke for real this time, panting, disappointed and ashamed, but at least she was alone.

"Oh for fuck's sake," she hissed. 

 _ "Rey_ _!"_ said Kylo in her mind through the bond, like he'd tried to call her name many times before she'd heard. His voice was stern, annoyed.  _ "I don't know what's going on there, but you're going to need to explain why I just had to leave a staff meeting in an embarrassing state." _


	9. Watching

"You're... just going to watch?" Kylo asked.

 

Rey hadn't heard his arrival from behind, but he now stood beside her, casually drinking a cup of coffee.

 

He didn't have to look in her mind to see she was frozen by shock. It was written all over her face. Neither could look away.

 

"They're really going for it," he commented, taking a drink.

 

"Yeah, under my X-wing," Rey said with annoyance, finally regaining control of her slackened mouth. "Why can't they go find a bed? They don't even belong out in the hangar, they're comm techs."

 

"They'd have had more privacy under the A-wing over there in the corner."

 

"Or their bunks, maybe?"

 

"You have to admire that athleticism. Not bad for desk workers."

 

Finally Rey blushed, and averted her eyes from the rutting. She flicked her eyes to his for a heartbeat, and he caught her.

 

"You don't seem flustered."

 

"I'm surrounded by the noisy minds of a thousand soldiers day and night on this star destroyer, and they have vivid imaginations."

 

"Imaginations? Not memories?"

 

"Some have memories, but not many. So you're actually just going to watch this?"

 

"Yep. I'm curious."

 

"You haven't seen this before?"

 

"Only mating porgs, but it's not the same."

 

"I don't know what porgs are, but I should hope not."

 

"Wait, what's even happening now?"

 

"Do you need me to explain the facts of life?"

 

"Maybe?"

 

"He didn't want to get her pregnant so he pulled out."

 

"Aren't there tidier ways to do that?"

 

"They usually take forethought."

 

"Such as?"

 

"Didn't get taught this as a youngling?"

 

"Nope. But me knowing more can only benefit you."

 

Kylo felt the burn of liquid heading up into his nasal cavity, but managed to stop it before coffee came out his nose.


	10. Stalling

"You're stalling."

 

"I'm thinking."

 

"We should have used the timer."

 

"You'd have just broken it again."

 

"You know what you need to do, just do it."

 

"No, there's got to be another way."

 

"There isn't. Do it."

 

"Hey, today I heard a dirty joke that I don't understand. Want to explain it to me?"

 

"No. Take your turn."

 

"What's the difference between a flea circus and a cancan line?"

 

"I couldn't care less."

 

"A flea circus is a cunning array of stunts."

 

"For the love of kriff, take your turn."

 

"I have so many questions. Why is it funny? What am I missing? What's a flea circus? What's a cancan line?"

 

"Damn it, Rey, it's a rook, not your best friend. Just make the sacrifice and take your turn."

 

The checkered stone board sat heavily on the glossy black table. Each piece shone, displaying the intricate carvings and expensive detailing. It had been a gift from an ally to the new Supreme Leader, an ancient low tech game board clearly meant for display more than use. A quick scan on his pad had provided the rules, and it had become a welcome distraction during Rey's visits to his cold, minimalist chambers.

 

"I might need the rook later, there has to be a way to save him."

 

"Save it, not him, and the rook is doomed. Let it go and save yourself, avoid yet another stalemate."

 

"Maybe if you were less willing to sacrifice everything but your queen you'd be able to win outright instead of all these stalemates."

 

"The queen is the only really useful one."

 

"Except when sacrificing your queen for a lowly pawn wins the game."

 

"And has that happened for you once yet?"

 

"You know for all your talk you lose your queen more often than I do because you overplay her?"

 

Kylo flicked his eyes up from the board to Rey's face. She had her elbow on the table, supporting her cheek with her fist. A pensive expression gave her pretty features depth, her eyes a window into her quick, analytical brain as she evaluated her pieces.

 

"Well someone's gotta change or take some risks or we'll be stuck in a stalemate forever," she muttered, fingering the rook.

 

Considering this for a moment, Kylo pushed up with relaxed grace, leaned over the board, and placed a soft, easy kiss on her mouth. He could hear Rey make an "oh!" sound, and when he sat back down her mouth hung open and she was scarlet.

 

"You're right," he agreed casually, "someone had to take a risk. Now take your goddamn turn."


	11. Braids

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this last week, then tonight I saw something similar on Tumblr. I've decided to post this anyway. I know it's all tropes, and my work isn't particularly original, but as long as I enjoy writing it, it's worth it. If others can get some enjoyment from it as well, even better.

"You've changed your hair," Kylo said, not sure why the new configuration disturbed him at first glance. "And you're crying. Are you hurt?"

 

Rey wiped her eyes on her sleeves, then accepted the elegant black dinner napkin Kylo handed her from his table setting.

 

"No," she said hoarsely, "I don't really know why I'm so upset. I just had a lovely chat with your mum and she was so kind. Both your parents have been so kind to me, were so kind to me, Ben. You're so much like them, and your mum loves you so much."

 

Tears began to flow again, and Kylo was torn between comforting her and fleeing the awkward conversation.

 

He compromised by patting her on the shoulder, but she drew herself in until he held her. While her body shook in his arms, he examined her hair.

 

"How was she kind to you?"

 

"She said all these reassuring things about how I was wanted and valued, how my parents probably suffered from an addiction that prevented them from being able to care for me, that I have a family here now."

 

Kylo traced a complicated braid that ran across Rey's head like a band, holding the rest back. His heart felt heavy identifying it.

 

"And?"

 

"And we talked about how I haven't really mourned for the loss of my parents, who I thought they could be, the future I thought we could share if I waited long enough."

 

"I guess I put an end to those daydreams," Kylo said gently. "I don't regret it."

 

"No, but the general was right. This is the first time I've really slowed down and thought about it. And it's true, I may not have a homeland or a culture or relatives, but I have a family now."

 

"And it looks like they'll loan you some of theirs."

 

"What do you mean?" Rey asked, backing up enough to look him in the face with weepy eyes. Kylo ran his fingers over the bumps of her braid again, admiring the artistry.

 

"Did my mother braid your hair?"

 

"Mm-hm," Rey agreed. "I've never had someone do that before. It felt so soothing."

 

"This is a mourning braid," Kylo explained. "Women from Alderaan, they wear them after a loss. She may not be Alderaanian by birth, but the culture is important to her."

 

"I thought it was just a style. Your mum wears one all the time."

 

Kylo felt like he was going to be sick.

 

"She's grieving my father."

 

Rey bit her lip, and Kylo felt a complicated tangle of loss and regret and love.

 

"When I was young," he pushed on, "and Alderaan had only been destroyed a few years earlier, all the surviving women wore these large braids all the time." He gestured to around his head with one hand. "There was too much work to be done establishing a colony to lose themselves to grief. They kept moving, like Leia does."

 

"I feel like I could cry all night," Rey admitted, feeling not only her heartbreak but his.

 

"Here," he said quietly, scooping her up and carrying her to the bed. He laid her down gently in the middle, and curled up around her. It was by far the most intimate they'd been outside of dreams. "I only have an hour now before an evening meeting, but I'll come to you tonight."

 

Rey slept, not sure how long Kylo had been gone. He'd left two blankets on her to make up for his lost heat, and she didn't wake until there was a soft tap at her door.

 

"Ben?" she said groggily as the door opened.

 

"No, it's not Finn, dear, it's Leia. You missed today's brief and I wanted to make sure you were doing alright after our talk earlier."

 

Rey rolled over, realized Kylo wasn't there, and relaxed. Leia was dressed casually, more like a common soldier, only her signet rings betraying her rank and birth.

 

"Thank you, General, I was upset but I think I needed it. I'm sorry I missed the meeting."

 

"It's understandable, just don't make it a habit," the older woman said with a tired smile. Being maternal to Rey came easily, she soaked up the attention Leia had bestowed upon a chosen few since it had been rejected by her own child.

 

Rey stood, smoothing back her hair from where it had been mussed sleeping.

 

"I've probably ruined your pretty mourning braid, I'm sorry," she said regretfully.

 

A thoughtful expression filled Leia's eyes, thoughtful leaning towards troubled.

 

"Mourning braid? How... insightful of you to even know it was a thing to look up."

 

Rey spotted a slip of paper and a small coil of blue ribbon on the crate beside her bed a moment too late.

 

_A token from your new family, of which I hope I may be considered a part. Alderaan-blue, to be plaited in._

 

The note was unsigned, but Ben Solo had not been gone so long that his mother couldn't tell his handwriting across a room.

 

Leia picked up the ribbon by the end, letting it cascade down.

 

"You don't have to tell me," she said firmly, wearing the voice of a general like a mask over her breaking heart. "I won't pry. But I hope you'll trust me enough to explain this."

 

Rey took the offered ribbon, feeling the silky fibre slide against her calloused palms.

 

"On Alderaan, young boys gave their sweethearts hair ribbons to initiate courting. This was the colour of my house."

 

"We've become friends, Ben and I," Rey blurted. 

 

Leia locked the door, and gestured for Rey to sit on the bed. She took her son's note, held it tightly, watching the young woman compose herself.

 

"How are you communicating?"

 

"The Force connected us, though Snoke said he started it. After Starkiller, he'd just appear for a few minutes, and we'd talk. He- he seemed to understand me, even when all I could do was rage at him."

 

"What was Snoke's role in this?"

 

"He said he used Ben as bait to lure me in, that I wasn't wise enough to resist it," she said, feeling the stinging shame even now of being manipulated, a taste of what Kylo felt all the time.

 

"Bait how?"

 

Rey hesitated, but Leia pursed her lips, expecting her to continue.

 

"Snoke chose moments Ben was vulnerable and, I'm sorry,attractive, to make me think I could turn him, to want to turn him. Maker, I feel stupid."

 

"Rey, by your age I was already in love with a barely literate smuggler with a great smile and a smart mouth. I understand."

 

"Ben killed Snoke, but wouldn't leave with me. He wanted to stay, he asked-" Rey began to tear.

 

"He asked you to stay with him," Leia finished intuitively. "But you're still communicating?"

 

"At first we couldn't help it, even without Snoke, it seemed like the Force had us tied together. But now we're never really apart."

 

Rey wiped her eyes and gave Leia a steady look. "I understand if you think I'm a liability to the Resistance and need me to leave."

 

Leia took her hand.

 

"I have to think about it, no promises. But I do need to know, do you think he could turn? Rey I won't lie to you, if there's a chance of bringing him home I'll take it."

 

"He's so broken, it's hard to tell. I think Han almost had him convinced when his whole face changed, like something had possessed him. Maybe if you tried, now that Snoke is gone?"

 

"I once lived as a bounty hunter and infiltrated the lair of Jabba the Hutt to rescue Han. Solo men are hopeless, but I'd do anything for them."

 

The women talked and planned late into the night, bonded by their different loves for the troubled young man, and for his father.

 

"You know, Rey," Leia said, giving a finish pat to the complicated braid shot with blue silk that swirled over Rey's crown. "The amount of energy it must take the Force to bring you together across the galaxy could probably tear a planet apart, and here you are using it to flirt. Here's your mission: bring him home, any means necessary. The Force has bonded him with you, not me, so you're our best hope."

 

When Kylo finally returned, weary from numbers and bickering financiers, he relaxed at the sight of Rey in her bed. A tired smile crossed his lips when he saw the ribbon in her hair, not yet connecting the dots.

 

He stripped down to his pants, and slipped in next to her. Tracing the pattern of the plait, cold rushed through him, his stomach dropping.The pattern was a lover's knot, his mother's handiwork again. It was bridal.

 

Reaching out for the note he probably shouldn't have left, he checked to see if he'd foolishly signed it. No signature. Just four additional words scrawled in elegant, distinctive silver pencil.

 

_ I love you, Ben. _


	12. Tired

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this one got away from me and turned into more of a one-shot wearing a ficlet disguise...

"You're too tired to fly," Rey observed, watching Kylo's head snap up over his controls. Nothing could stop the slide of his eyelids back down to his cheeks, his hands too heavy to move. "I have a co-pilot and I'm rested, let me."

 

She examined the First Order heavy freighter he flew alone.

 

"There, there's a bedroom here. You go lie down, I'll fly."

 

Kylo shook his head, trying to summon reserves of energy.

 

"There soon, landing next."

 

"Why didn't you just tell the computer to wake you?"

 

"Too dangerous."

 

"How long have you been awake?"

 

"Four days."

 

They entered the atmosphere, but Rey was watching Kylo's clumsy fingers.

 

"Promise me you'll sleep when you land?"

 

He spared a moment to raise a hand in a slow, sloppy salute.

 

"Promise, ma'am."

 

The landing gear made a horrible screeching noise as he touched down next to what looked like a bombed out factory. The engines died, and Kylo switched off the ship's computer so it became one more hunk of metal under the precarious shelter of a leaning corrugated steel wall.

 

"'Night," he groaned, moving past her out of the cockpit and stumbling to the room she'd pointed out. He took and squeezed her hand once as he passed, his mind blank. Within seconds Rey felt him slip into proper deep sleep.

 

"Rey?" said a voice beside her in her reality.

 

Poe Dameron set the cruise on their battered old ship, hammering twice on the button when it insisted on jamming.

 

"Do you want to change first, or mission brief first?"

 

Nibbling a corner of her lip, she thought about her exhausted bond mate. Keeping things from him was becoming difficult, though he'd done a fair enough job these past few days. Half his current state had to have been the mental energy he'd expended keeping her out of his head.

 

"Brief first," she chose, taking advantage of the privacy.

 

Poe's face was serious, handsome, and as always around Rey, carefully professional. Earning his trust had been months in the making, and she was relieved he'd finally let her take on some responsibility.

 

"Twice now I've met a potential First Order defector. She's given me information that's proven she has some clout, and she says that she can make us a deal. I think it might be Phasma, judging by her size."

 

"Damn," Rey breathed, "that would be something."

 

"I need a witness to whatever deal they have for us, she said that's fine."

 

"And obviously you couldn't bring Finn if it's Phasma."

 

"We know where Hux and Ren are," Poe said, avoiding her face when he mentioned the unmentionable man, "they're hunting the senators who survived Starkiller. Hux apparently picked off three in the last week, and Ren is off the radar tracking one on on his own."

 

"So no chance you'd risk Leia here either."

 

"We're meeting on Fest. It's not a safe place for us, but it'll be easy to disappear into a crowd. There's snow gear for you in back, and a change, those clothes are too distinctive."

 

"So what's our objective?"

 

"We'll hear her out, and decide whether or not to take the deal."

 

"Just like that?"

 

"Leia trusts me to decide," he said gently, but the reminder of his rank was there.

 

"Any idea what sort of arrangement this could be?"

 

"None at all. I was also hoping, and let me know if this is crossing some sort of Jedi ethics boundary-"

 

"If I could try to snoop in her head a bit? I can try."

 

"We don't want her to feel it, we don't want her feeling betrayed or giving away who you are, so don't try if there's any chance she'll find out."

 

"Do you want me to practice on you?"

 

Rey could see him fighting a cringe.

 

"I'm not going to lie, the last time someone was in my mind it was... traumatic."

 

"I'll go easy. You shouldn't know I'm there."

 

Rey leaned forward in her seat, pushing that part of her mind out imperceptibly until it brushed up against Poe's.

 

He was sweating, his nails scritching at the seams of his trousers. In his mind were fear-tinted memories of a black and silver mask, red light, familiar pain and a new pain, the tearing of thoughts. Rey saw Kylo from Poe's perspective, and it was a harsh reminder of how far she'd come, they'd come.

 

"Let me know when you're in," Poe said tersely.

 

Rey pulled back, shifting her whole body away. His mind was a pleasant enough place, he was a great person, but she felt hers recoil, gratefully pushing her back out. What she felt in Kylo's mind, that draw, that sense of belonging, maybe that wasn't typical.

 

"I'm done, actually," she said reassuringly.

 

He blew out a breath and put his head between his knees a moment.

 

"Seriously? You're done?"

 

He looked back up at her, wiping his face with his hands.

 

"I didn't feel a thing and I was concentrating on it, so she shouldn't. What did you see?"

 

"Your interrogation."

 

"Yeah," was all he answered.

 

They sat in silence, Rey eventually moving to the back of the ship to change while Poe composed himself.

 

She put on the warm, close-fitted grey trousers, a matching belted tunic, tall black combat boots, and a heavy, knee-length hooded cloak in a green that would disappear into shadows. There was ample room under the cloak for a hidden blaster and a small belted pack. Over it all she settled a soft pale grey cowl that could be pulled up over her ears or face.

 

"We'll be landing in a few minutes, close to the downtown. It's later afternoon here, sundown is in a couple of hours. Be prepared for more people than you've seen in your lifetime," Poe shouted from the front.

 

Rey came forward and checked out the view from the front while Poe talked to the local tower, getting docking instructions. The city was dense, tall buildings and plazas, buzzing with traffic from speeders and small craft.

 

"Have you been here before?"

 

"Yeah, stay close, blend in, all that."

 

It didn't take long to get clear. Having all the legitimate paperwork for the ship helped, and Rey managed to play it cool as her fake identification was scanned.

 

It was cold outside, snowing blowing through the crowds moving along the streets. She didn't have much of an urge to gawk at the tall buildings, since it meant hard flakes whipping at her eyes.

 

"This wind, it feels like it's burning my skin," Rey complained. "How can cold burn?"

 

Poe laughed and gave her a friendly smile behind his balaclava.

 

"Come on, desert girl, let's find a sleazy noodle bar."

 

He guided her down the unmarked streets, a gloved hand on her back.

 

"This place looks disgusting," Rey said when they arrived. A placard in the window said that it was under review from the municipal board of health, and in front of that was the dusty carcass of a large insect.

 

"Yup, this is it," said her partner, excitement creeping into his voice.

 

"Do we have to eat here? Why is it so crowded?"

 

"Because their food is legendary," he explained, pushing her through the entrance past the cracked glass door. Half the lights were broken, the padding on the booths was torn, and the floor was might as well have been gravel.

 

Poe ordered for them, and made his way to the very back. Rey came close to losing him, but he grabbed her hand to pull her along. They went through a door marked in Festian that she assumed said something like kitchen, but found a dark corridor, the smell of grease diminishing instead of increasing. Along the hall were windowless metals doors, ancient brown paint falling off in large patches.

 

Not hesitating, Poe knocked once and then entered the last door on the left. Rey kept her hood and cowl up, as Poe had instructed.

 

A large person wearing Mandalorian armour was seated at a square table with three legs, four empty bowls stacked in the corner. They examined Poe and Rey as the pair entered.

 

"You brought a friend," said the cool female voice from the helmet's speaker.

 

"As expected," Poe reminded cautiously. "You can trust him, he's just here to listen." Rey was taken aback a moment by his pronoun use.

 

"I'd trust him more if I could see him."

 

"You know, I feel the same way about you," Poe said wryly. "You show me yours I'll show you mine." He pointed his thumb at Rey's hood. "Otherwise we can just do this blind."

 

Rey felt Kylo's mental wall soften, confusing images flooding her mind. 

 

He wanted to probe someone else's mind but couldn't do that through his barrier. She felt his intention of trying to swiftly get what he needed then blocking Rey back out. Wherever he was he was making her dizzy, strange double vision disorienting her.

 

"No," said the woman at the table in disbelief. She stood, her body language to Poe becoming threatening. "You fool."

 

"Whoa, lady, I don't know wha-"

 

"You've brought your little Jedi out to play a dangerous game," she hissed.

 

"Rey, who is this," Poe demanded, edging towards the door and discreetly reaching under the back her cloak for the blaster.

 

Obedient to her commander, Rey focused her eyes on the helmet and pushed hard. The mental wall between them melted.

 

"Kylo," she gasped. "What are you doing?"

 

Kylo froze Poe, whose finger had just wrapped around the trigger. The leader of the First Orderpulled off his helmet and shook out his long, dark hair. Rey noticed a tiny bit of noodle on stuck to his chin.

 

"I thought you were supposed to be Phasma," Poe said angrily.

 

"How did you get to be leader of a rebellion if a simple voice moderator can deceive you," Kylo retorted. "Put down your weapon. I am still willing to offer you my deal."

 

Kylo shot Rey a significant look that promised she was in trouble, but she only glared back.

 

"We can trust him," Rey said calmly. In his head she was less poised.  _ "I can't fucking believe you. This is why you've been keeping me out? Why couldn't you tell me you were negotiating with us?" _

 

"The First Order will stop actively seeking the Resistance provided no military action is taken by the rebels against us. This arrangement is good for one year."

 

Even in scuffed armour Kylo looked regal, dangerous, and if Rey was picking up the apprehension Poe was feeling then Kylo certainly was.

 

_ "You have food on your face," _ she taunted, showing him an image.

 

He continued to ignore her presence in his head.

 

"We'll take the deal," Poe said angrily. "Now release me."

 

Kylo turned his full attention back to Rey, ignoring the pilot fighting his Force binds.

 

"I have another offer for you, little Jedi. Come with me now and I'll give every rebel in your troupe amnesty."

 

"The answer is no," Poe spat.

 

Kylo's eyes were all pupil, soaking her in. Rey had forgotten what it felt like to be in the same room, how all the air seemed to evaporate. She moved toe to toe with him, forcing him to look sharply down to meet her eyes.

 

"Go fuck yourself, Ren," she said harshly.

 

He put a gloved finger under the chin.

 

"I'd rather fuck you," he stage whispered so Dameron could hear. Rey could feel his sinister amusement.

 

She tuned out Poe's lengthy, profane response, defending her honour.

 

_ "You are in so much trouble later." _

 

_ "I'll risk it ." _

 

_ "Why are you doing this to him?" _

 

_ "I didn't intend to blow my cover, now I have to play Kylo Ren the asshole." _

 

_ "Meet me around back after?" _

 

_ "God yes." _

 

_ "Did you actually eat the noodles in this disgusting place?" _

 

_ "I can't stop, they're so good." _

 

"You can go to hell, you tyrant," Rey ordered with disgust, stepping away from his touch.

 

"One year, Dameron," Kylo said ominously, flicking the noodle bit off his skin and sliding his helmet back into place. "You don't hit us, we don't hunt you down."

 

He strode out, leaving the door open. Rey chased him with a roar, assuming he could keep Poe frozen long enough to lose them in the crowd.

 

"Rey, no!" Poe called after her.

 

She ducked and wove through patrons, pulling up her cowl and hood, keeping her eye on the Mandalorian helmet.

 

_ "Turn left," _ he instructed when she reached the door. The snow drift covered alley had a line of large foot steps running down the middle. She followed them, leaping slightly to make her steps fit inside his.

 

"Hello, little Jedi," said a deep voice behind her once she neared the end of the line. Helmet on a crate beside him, his face was torn between teasing and being genuinely upset with her.

 

"Stop calling me that, he can't hear you here," she huffed, throwing down her hood and cowl and reaching her arms around him for a hug. He held her, putting a bare cheek to the top of her head. "I'm so mad at you right now."

 

"You seem mad," he observed, pressing his lips to her forehead. It was so cold he knew they wouldn't have long like this, even if Dameron wasn't currently searching the restaurant for her. "My offer stands. Come back with me, Rey. I'll protect your people."

 

"Protect them anyway," she demanded, finding his mouth and stealing a quick brush with his lips.

 

"And here I thought the highlight of my day would be the food. Wait-" Kylo's black eyes were distant a moment. "Dameron is quicker than I anticipated, he's coming this way."

 

Kylo bent her back, swooping down for a melodramatic, punishing kiss. Rey let him overpower her, listening to Poe's boots approach.

 

"You stay away from her," Poe yelled. Pride shone through Rey at her friend's courage, shouting unarmed at the most dangerous Force-wielder he would ever encounter.

 

Kylo dropped her into the snow, crouching over her possessively. She lay still, pretending to be stunned.

 

"No," he sneered. "The girl is mine, and you're the fool who brought her back into my path. I will wait for her to come to me willingly, but remember who she belongs to."

 

He blasted the pilot back off his feet, and Rey watched Kylo escape into the crowded street. The helmet was gone.

 

_ "Too much?" _

 

_ "They're never going to let me leave base again, asshole." _

 

_ "At least you're not running with a very full stomach." _

 

_ "So this is where you were landing? Fest?" _

 

_ "By way of several other planets, and two stolen ships. It's hard to shake my own people, and nothing I do is private. On this trip I also managed to launder some money into an account I can use untraced." _

 

_ "Why the deal? What's in it for you?" _

 

_ "Not seeing you killed by my men?" _

 

Poe helped Rey up from her feigned swoon, and after she'd reassured him that she was unharmed, they crunched their way through the snow back to the restaurant.

 

"I'm not eating here," she said, stopping in her tracks when she realized Poe was guiding her back in.

 

"You need a minute to rest, and our order is ready. You won't regret trying it."

 

_ "For once in your life listen to Poe Dameron,"  _ Kylo encouraged.

 

_ "You don't want me shot down by a TIE, but you want me to risk my life eating here?" _

 

Rey growled but followed her commander back into the filthy storefront.

 

_ "So now that your skullduggery is done, you're going back to lurking in my head?" _

 

_ "I did miss you." _

 

_ "How did you meet with Poe twice before this without disaster following?" _

 

_ "I reminded myself of the look on his face as you said my name instead of his." _

 

Rey was grateful for the cowl that still covered most of her face.

 

_ "I thought we agreed to never mention it again after I found you thinking about it the next morning with your right hand firmly wrapped around your c-" _

 

_ "Duly noted." _

 

_ "Kriff these noodles are good. Even if I die of food poisoning I won't regret it." _

 

_ "All I ask is your trust." _

 

_ "As if that's all you ask." _

 

_ "What will you tell Dameron?" _

 

_ "That every time you see me you try to literally seduce me to the dark side." _

 

_ "That's close enough to the truth. I'm certainly trying to seduce you, though I've never asked you to be anything other than you are. You're stronger in the light, I don't want to change that."  _ His tone became more raw.  _ "I just want you with me." _


	13. Porgs

"You're keeping me up," Rey accused. Kylo was silent, his hands behind his back.

 

"All your nightmares are red," Rey continued complaining sleepily. "Five red lasers crossing the sky, red throne room, me fighting red guards, red salt, even Hux is red."

 

She pulled the earthy brown blanket tighter around her shoulders and stood beside him at the window over looking the AT-AT floor.

 

"No wonder you like it here at night. It's all soft grey."

 

He didn't immediately respond, but shifted a step closer so that their bodies touched.

 

"I'm sorry I woke you," he said, voice gravelly from disuse.

 

"You know what's been helping me sleep? Porgs."

 

"I'm not interested in street drugs."

 

"No, they're birds"

 

"And when you eat them you get sleepy?" he asked, perplexed.

 

"No, they're just relaxing to have around. Need any help with work?"

 

"No."

 

"Want to play a game of chess?"

 

"Not really."

 

"Want to go make out in your room?"

 

"No- wait, what?"


	14. Behind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, smut. Tropes. Smutty tropes.

"You're behind me, aren't you."

 

Silence.

 

"Rey, is that you?" he called again.

 

"Ben, I could use a hand if you're there. Or two hands even."

 

Rey's voice floated into his bathroom with a heady scent of rain and flowers. He finished drying off his hair, and threw the towel around his waist. Not seeing her, but sensing her proximity, he wondered how much of him she had just taken in.

 

Crossing the threshold into his bedroom, he found himself in a strange location.

 

"I'm sorry to ask, but I had to wear a dress for a fancy party put on by some of General Organa's allies, and now I can't get it back off by myself."

 

"Where are you?"

 

All he could see was cool mist that dampened his freshly dried skin. Under his bare feet he felt smooth stone blocks.

 

"Our hosts live in a monstrous glass house up on the hill, but they said they found the idea of having a Jedi knight of old, their words not mine, as a guest made them feel romantic, so my room for the night is apparently in something called a garden folly," Rey answered, sounding like she was struggling with something.

 

"It's a partially ruined tower," Kylo said, coming out of the mist to see that he was on a balcony over a decorative waterfall. Running clusters of pale wisteria dripped with steady evening rain from above him, deep purple hydrangea and lilac overflowing the rails, finishing the framed view.

 

From the balcony he saw candle light and a glowing stone hearth, a luxurious set of chambers with glass doors that could seal the little room off from the elements.

 

"I've never seen anywhere like this in my life," said Rey, "I didn't know places like this existed. There are trees outside with trunks so large that when I wrap my arms around them my fingers don't tou- _goddamn dress_. In here, Ben."

 

Off kilter in the surreal romanticism and soft lushness of the environment, he stepped hesitantly into the main chamber, adjusting his towel.

 

Rey turned to look back at him over her shoulder, and laughed at his vulnerable state.

 

"I'm so sorry, did you want to come back once you've had a chance to dress?"

 

He couldn't speak.

 

Kylo was attracted to Rey when she wore scraps of unwashed rags twisted around her athletic frame. This was an unfamiliar creature from a story, not his scavenger.

 

She had a full skirt of bold cobalt blue that brushed the floor, pale grey sleeves that wrapped down her shoulders and around and around her lithe waist, crossing blue and grey, finished with a lacy white sash and hair ribbons that were luminescent in the firelight.

 

"There are all these ties and buttons, and my friends are all back up at the main house. I'm alone here," she said, gesturing at her back, exposing her neck.

 

"I can help," he affirmed, trying to quash a wolffish urge to sink his teeth into the bare skin. Kylo steadied his breathing, reached for the first button. "And you're all alone here, you say."

 

"All alone," Rey repeated, her casual tone slipping. She turned her eyes to meet his. They were on fire. "It's almost like I planned it," she whispered daringly. He felt her hand shoot out and flick off his towel, leaving him naked. "I hope you enjoyed your shower as much as I did."

 

He caught an image of her watching him bathe, kitted out like a voyeuristic queen.

 

"I hope you know what you're getting yourself into, girl." He pressed himself to her back, nipped at her nape. Running a finger down the line of buttons, he used the Force to pop each one effortlessly, the knots around her waist melting away. Under the dress was nothing but her maiden body, supple and strong.

 

Thunder rumbled outside, and the storm became heavier. The wind carried drops of rain and torn flower petals in little eddies, but neither seemed to care enough to close the doors.

 

"We've been dancing around this long enough. You want me, Kylo Ren? _Claim me_. But it'll cost you half your soul," she said fiercely, now naked as him.

 

He swept her up in his arms, lightning illuminating the heavy four poster bed. Silk hangings fluttered wildly, and he wrenched them aside with his mind. He lay her on the soft coverlet, taking a moment to appreciate the exquisite offering she was making.

 

"That's a price I'm willing to pay," he finally answered, "to do all the unspeakable things to you that I've wanted to."

 

Kylo scaled the bed, hovering over her. His scars shone in the flickering light, his face a strange half mask, sending a wicked thrill through Rey.

 

Held immobilized by his strength, she tried to kiss him, but he resisted.

 

"We've waited too long for this, and my patience is thin," he growled. A mental consent check told him that she was thoroughly enjoying herself. He swept his fingers into her core and they sunk deeply into molten liquid.

 

She'd clearly started the party without him, likely while he been in the refresher. The thought of her in her finery, surreptitiously touching herself to the sight of his body, this seduction planned, sent him into a primal state.

 

"I see we can do away with the niceties." Kylo spread her legs, dipped his hips between them, and pushed home all at once. She gasped. There was no pain, but the invasion was unfamiliar, having him suddenly deep inside of her.

 

"Ben," she breathed, pressing her teeth into his shoulder to relieve tension when he began plunging in again and again.

 

"No," he corrected, cupping her chin with his palm so that she saw him. His dark hair fell wildly over his pale face while he continued to thrust, hers a tangle across the pillow. "No Ben tonight. You brought me to this fantasy land, so you get Kylo Ren, Death himself."

 

He supported himself above her with both hands planted by her head, increasing the intensity of his movements. Rey moaned, running her fingers down her neck, across her collar bones, squeezing her breasts, part desire part display. Thunder crashed, overwhelming the noise of her approaching orgasm.

 

He was unyielding, driving her towards that edge. Rey gave herself over to him, to be consumed by his hungry darkness, wanting him to have this of her. There would be times in the future they'd join gently, or with her dominant, but this first time was for breaking things down, and destruction was Kylo's specialty.

 

When she peaked, Kylo finally kissed her, stealing her breath as she came apart around him. He slowed his movement but didn't stop, working through her shuddering wet grip. A lustful idea crossed his mind and Rey mentally approved it.

 

Sweeping the small woman up over his shoulder, backside up, he took Rey outside into the storm. Catching her, bending her over the rail, he forcefully sank back into her warmth. The contrast of the cold rain and wind blowing around his skin, washing away the sweat, the stone pressed against her breasts, with the heat of their bodies was incredible.

 

His hands burned into her hips, hitting deeper at the new angle as he took her from behind. He was close, and a deep satisfaction rang inside of him as he realized Rey was again too. With a last erratic series of pounding thrusts he reached around and touched her furiously. Her hands reached back to still his hips as she crested, leaving long scratches across his backside. The unexpected pain sent him over the edge, a feral roar tore from his throat. He emptied inside of her, and he was faintly surprised how erotic Rey found the sensation.

 

Rubber-legged, both collapsed onto the dry carpet of Kylo's spartan quarters. They lay side by side breathing, soaking the fibres under them.

 

Before she was recovered, Kylo rolled onto his side and kissed her over and over, softly.

 

"You're my everything, Rey," he murmured into her neck, cleaning the stone grit from her breasts and waist with the cape he'd left on the floor before his shower. "You already had half my soul."

 

"And I'm keeping it," she said firmly. She dipped her fingers between her legs and then examined the white that coated them. "This too, apparently."

 

His fingertips brushed the wetness he'd left, grazing her swollen centre. She arched, her wet hair wild.

 

"Once more for me," he whispered, "if it's not too much." Touching her everywhere, mouthing at her breasts, her naval, he quickly brought her to a third and last orgasm with his fingers.

 

The little plastic and metal room had none of the romance of Rey's temporary forest keep, but Kylo was grateful to have made a memory here, something he could think about in this room when she vanished.

 

"Stay here with me tonight," he asked. Rey's expression was almost regretful.

 

"I don't know how we're to be apart after this. Maybe that's why both of us kept delaying the inevitable."

 

They spent the night pressed together in Kylo's bed, unable to let go.

 

Rey wouldn't know until the morning that the servants sent to check on her late in the evening found her chambers empty, flooded with rain, glass doors slamming in the storm, and reported her missing to their hosts and Leia. That they'd seen her dress and an unfamiliar black towel haphazardly thrown across the floor, the sheets used for coupling, but no sign of sleep. That Leia would privately call her to account the next day with piercing eyes that missed nothing.

 

Tonight was theirs, and tomorrow they'd begin to reorder their realities to make the arrangement permanent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who am I kidding, there'll be more.


	15. Right

"You're right, you're absolutely right," Rey started. "It's completely my fault."

 

Leia sat like an empress on the stool beside her metal fold-down breakfast table. Her quarters were exactly like everyone else's on the loaned cruiser they took back to base, but somehow she gave them a regal air with her poise and gravitas. She had a fierce glow under her inscrutable expression, hiding the fact she hadn't slept yet.

 

"I can completely understand why you would be upset hearing that I was missing from my rooms."

 

Rey paced the chambers, hastily dressed in her regular clothes, hair tied up in unbrushed buns, a soft brown cowl hiding all manner of sins. Her boots sounded loud in the silence. Leia had said nothing since she'd arrived.

 

Just raised an eyebrow. A single eyebrow.

 

Rey had broken like a strained dam.

 

"And that my clothes were all left behind. And that there were things there that didn't belong to me. Thing. Just the one thing. Just the bath towel. That would certainly be strange on top of worrying."

 

She raised her hands in offering.

 

"And I will absolutely make amends for any damage to the room we- I caused by leaving the doors open in the storm. I wouldn't think of leaving that for our hosts. Or you!"

 

Leia's face changed so little Rey could only assume what it meant. The girl's face was alternating pale and flushed in turns, her tightly wound body going from hot to cold with the various emotions she juggled.

 

"And I'll admit I should have told you what happened with Ben when Poe and I were on Fest, because then it would have made much more sense to you when he told everyone I must have been kidnapped by Kylo Ren, and wouldn't have been such a surprise when Finn rallied that disastrous rescue party. That was bad."

 

She took a deep breath.

 

"So bad."

 

Rey changed the direction of her pacing.

 

"It's amazing no one was hurt, and they made it safely home once I turned back up. Thank goodness. And I definitely didn't expect half the Resistance admiralty to be standing in my bedroom when I returned... naked...with some marks. On my neck and things. I should have given it more thought first before coming back from Ky-Be-where I was."

 

Heat won and a bead of sweat began to form on Rey's temple.

 

"I should have had the forethought to come up with something before everyone and their porg came up to me to ask if I'd been captured, after the Supreme Leader of the First Order had apparently, you know, done things to me, and all I could do when they asked was making squeaky noises. That wasn't helpful. Especially since, as everyone was so kind to point out, the bed clearly looked like two people had, um, done things. Together. Which would be the last thing you'd want to hear about, or have everyone talk about, or be forced to go see since the person in question is your son, and of course you unlike everyone else knew it was... possible..."

 

Rey stopped and looked at her mentor, who merely nodded once.

 

"Oh Leia, I'm so sorry, you're right, I've made a mess of all of this. I can't account for my whereabouts to the team, anytime someone mentions you know, him, I get flustered, and it's been non-stop for everyone since midnight. I'm grateful we left early, but I'm sorry to take you away from your friends. Of course they understood that a bunch of your people had commandeered ships to singlehandedly take on the First Order and needed to be reined in. Again. And Ben-"

 

Leia's face softened, just a hint, in response to Rey's vulnerable expression under the harsh glare of the ship lights.

 

"I love him. I do. And even with all this chaos I'm just floating around thinking about him. I can't stop thinking about, you know, everything."

 

Rey exhaled, her shoulders relaxing. She waited a less than a beat for Leia to say something, then pushed on.

 

"I know you're disappointed in me, but I'll do what I have to do to earn back your trust, General."

 

Leia nodded, Rey missing the wry half-smile.

 

"Alright, I'll go talk to Poe, see if I can convince him I was doing literally anything else in the world last night rather than -, I'll think of something. Thanks for the talk, Leia."

 

Rey dashed off, the door closing behind her before she could hear the small exasperated laugh that followed.

 

The young Jedi shut herself in the ship's engine room to think.

 

"How did it go with the general?" Kylo asked, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind and pulling her to his chest. His scent was familiar, his warmth comforting . "Fire and fury?"

 

"Something like that," Rey groaned, turning to hide her face in his cowl. "I'm so embarrassed."

 

"But you don't regret it," he half-stated, half-asked.

 

She looked up at him, examining the soft black eyes. On her tiptoes she stretched up to put a kiss on his lowered forehead.

 

"Never," she reassured.


	16. Dripping

"You're dripping on the carpet, Kylo, are you - _oh god_."

 

The spectre had showed up unexpectedly in the middle of her quarters in the late morning, an unusual stench following him. Rey glanced up from her engine schematics, saw the heave of his faintly smoking back, his heavy breathing, combined with the stillness of the rest of his pose.

 

His mind was a wordless turmoil, wrath transmuting into shock, and Rey could make no sense of it.

 

He turned slowly towards her on the spot, his face coming into the light of the through the tiny window. An arterial spray of blood crossed him, painted his face in thick spatters, soaked his clothes, was slicked into his hair. He raised his hands like in supplication. Blood fell from his fingers and stained the floor.

 

Feeling like she should probably fear for her safety, Rey's true fear was instead for Kylo's sanity.

 

"You're safe," Rey said calmly. "Ben, you're safe here."

 

His eyes were wide, wild, seeking but not finding understanding.

 

"Look at me," Rey entreated, moving towards him slowly, her own hands raised so he could see them.

 

Kylo found her eyes, found and locked on them, barely blinking. Trembling was starting in his limbs, his face paler where his skin was clean.

 

"Are you hurt," Rey asked slowly. He shook his head a fraction in a confused manner that told her nothing.

 

"Can you tell me where you just came from? What room were you in?"

 

Mouth working silently, it took several tries before he hoarsely ground out an answer.

 

"Bridge."

 

"Ben are you still on the bridge?"

 

"Ye-yes."

 

"Is there anyone else there? Are you alone?"

 

"Just Hux. Just his b- he's dead. He's dead, Rey."

 

"Did you kill him, Kylo," she asked softly.

 

"Yes."

 

"Are you hurt?"

 

He ignored the question, putting his memory into words.

 

"He built a new weapon like Starkiller. I didn't know. I didn't know. How could he have hidden something like big from me?" Kylo looked desperately at her, like she could provide the answers. "He turned to me, he'd made sure it was just the two of us, and said it was a demonstration to show I had no place in the First Order. And I saw the red light, just like last time, across the sky."

 

Rey gasped, her horror growing.

 

"Cynda, Gorse, Pasher, Li-Toran, and Jakku, he said, gone. To teach me a lesson. _Especially_ Jakku."

 

Rage was welling up past the shock, making Kylo squeeze his hands into bloody fists.

 

"I tried to stop it, but no matter how much of the Force I drew it wasn't enough, I couldn't catch the beams. It was already too big, too late. It was too late, Rey." His face contorted with anger and pain. "Hux will never kill again."

 

"Did you... use your bare hands?"

 

"I don't- I don't remember."

 

He looked at his own hands for the first time, touched the wetness on his face.

 

"We're all monsters here," he whispered.

 

"Let me help you," Rey said, approaching cautiously. She took his fingers in both of her hands, controlling her instinct to recoil from the blood.

 

Kylo allowed her to cross to his reality, the bridge of his shuttle.

 

"I can smell the blaster burns," she commented, ignoring the battered body of the genocidal maniac on the floor. "We need to clean you up, and get you away from here."

 

She unclasped Kylo's cape from his throat and used the fabric to wipe the console and her hands. He stared at Hux while she worked.

 

"The escape pods have all been launched, the rest of the crew have fled. We're alone here." She set a course and took them into hyperspace. "If they're tracking your shuttle, though, you won't be able to stay on it long."

 

Taking him back to his quarters, Rey methodically removed his clothes. He didn't object or assist, just stood numbly until she pushed him into the spray of the shower. Disregarding the state of her own clothes, she followed him in. He sat on the floor and allowed her to scrub his hair, his hands, to gently clean the raw and torn ridges of his face. Hux's blaster had barely grazed his shoulder, leaving a shiny red burn a handspan long with just needed some bacta and time.

 

When he was clean, Rey helped Kylo up, and dried him off. They found a change of clothes, and while he dressed Rey, ignoring her wet clothes, packed his gear.

 

"I'm surprised you didn't use your lightsaber," she said finally, combing out his wet hair into waves before it had time to curl up. He sat motionless on the bed, her demon-tormented doll for the moment.

 

"It's not working," he said roughly. "There's a problem with the kyber."

 

He handed her the black metal hilt from off his belt, hands still trembling intermittently. Rey tried the switch but he was right, nothing happened.

 

"How long has it been like this?"

 

He frowned.

 

"A day or more, I noticed not long after you and I spent the night together."

 

"Think something broke?"

 

"I think something changed."

 

Rey was used to Kylo feeling conflicted, confused, but not chaos of this level.


	17. Following

 

 

_ "You're following me," _ Rey accused, checking the position of the heart stopping First Order ship on her tail.  _"Did you look at my location on the console and change course?"_

 

_ "My ship is significantly faster than yours, and I've decided that I'm impatient, tired of sharing a bridge with what's left of the ginger menace, it's been a terrible day, and I'm not falling asleep tonight without you in my arms. I'm programming this damned ship to fly straight into the nearest sun." _

 

Rey felt a rush of warmth. She could feel he meant exactly what he said, images of them piled together, asleep, like a basket of kittens. Sleep didn't come easily to either of them, but in Kylo's mind they'd achieved it together.

 

_ "What happened to meeting on Ahch-To?" _

 

_ "Prepare to be boarded." _

 

Kylo's command Upsilon was a menacing sight even at the best of times, let alone when he sounded like a baritone pirate of uncertain mental stability.

 

_ "You're lucky I got permission from Poe to take out a small shuttle without explaining my mission, or else I'd be an an A-wing and you'd be out of luck." _

 

The Upsilon grappled onto the side of her ship, the doors creaking together as they created a seal. She heard footsteps ringing down the metal slats, heavy steps, _real steps,_ sending thrills through her frayed nerves.

 

For a moment she forgot this was her bondmate, her other half, her gentle confident and friend, recently taken to her bed. She'd said the words to his mother in her fluster that she hadn't yet told him.

 

But in this moment, unexpectedly boarding her ship, filling up the hold with his great black-clad body, he looked like Kylo Ren, murderer. His eyes were intense as they found her. Penetrating, like he was deep in her consciousness. He made to stalk towards her, motion in the corner of his vision distracting him to a fullstop.

 

"What the sweet fuck is going on here, Rey." He turned his head in every direction, baffled.

 

"I told you to meet me on Ahch-To. You weren't supposed to see this."

 

"How could you keep me from seeing this in your mind the whole flight since you left your base?"

 

She shrugged, clearing off the co-pilot's seat so he could carefully pick his way through.

 

The entire shuttle was packed with soft, vacant-eyed, noisy porgs, blinking up at Kylo, and giving brave little trills of welcome.

 

"There were too many of them on the _Millennium Falcon_ , so Chewie decided we should send as many as we could back home. Or at least try. That's what Poe thinks I'm doing, anyway. Stretching my legs, getting away from the drama, returning porgs, all that."

 

Kylo made a spot on the floor for his pack, and reached out to poke one of the fluffy birds. It didn't react, staring blankly. He watched through the viewscreen, over the porgs, as his personal shuttle, a mark of his power, his position, of Snoke's favour, of so much of his past, disconnected itself, and took off at hyper speed towards it's untimely end.

 

_ Good riddance. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raise your hand if you needed something lighter after last chapter.


	18. Huts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much fluff.

“You’re going to take that hut there, and I’ll take Luke’s.”

Kylo’s face fell a bit.

“Oh.”

“I didn’t think you’d want to stay in Luke’s old home.”

“Is it really because I killed a man I’ve known most of my life with my bare hands this morning?”

Rey paused a beat.

“Yes.”

“Are you afraid of me?”

She thought a moment and he followed her mental progression.

“No,” she said slowly, “but I think we both need our own designated spaces so we have somewhere to go when we inevitably argue over something stupid.”

“Is that likely?”

They stared at each other. The only times they’d met in person were of short duration and ended in mental or physical conflict.

 

"I'll put my pack in that one for now," Kylo agreed, "but I have every intention of finishing what Skywalker interrupted here."

 

"And what was that? Heavy breathing and some finger tips?"

 

Kylo caught Rey around the waist, exerting his dominant physical size, and pulled her down to the ground. Her poncho protected her back from the wet glass, but she felt herself sink a little into the soft earth as he pressed himself down on top of her.

 

"That mouth," he shook his head. "Always one step ahead." He kissed her, drowning her token protests, the knees of his pants soaking from where he knelt between her legs. "I should take you right here so the porgs can watch."

 

"I'm not having sex in the mud surrounded by porg," she demanded. "We'll fuck later, in your uncle's bed in his exile hut, like civilized people."

 

He barked a laugh that was so alarmingly rare she was startled. Ben caught up both packs, and carted them off to the hut she'd initially chosen for herself, his mood light.

 

"We'll need a fire if you expect me to take my clothes off," Rey called after him. Groaning impatiently, he gathered his wood and set it to spark in the fire hole.

 

Rey followed him in and inspected Luke's gear. It had been maintained by the fishwives, now part of the permanent Ahch-To Jedi exhibit, and just needed a quick clean.

 

"Why don't you go unload the cargo-"

 

"You mean the bird things-"

 

"The porgs," she corrected, "and go explore a bit. I'll get us settled in."

 

Ben needed to stretch after his long journey and his muscles still felt strange from the day. The high of leaving the First Order, of physically being with Rey, would not stop the emotional reckoning he knew would come.

 

Arms loads of noisy creatures deposited into the grass, he scoured the shuttle for the ones who had hidden away in and crannies. There were many. When he was confident he'd done what he could for the moment (and would look all over again the next day) he took up Rey's offer to range the island. It was both brutal and peaceful, home to danger and beauty. He could feel the darkness under his feet as he scooped up a handful of small flowers to examine them.

 

Standing over the breathtaking vista of the ocean he'd seen in Rey's mind what felt like so long ago, he started noticing an almost pinging sensation in his own mind. Rey was looking for things, simple things, diving in and out of his thoughts so quickly he couldn't tell what she'd seen.

 

Curious, he turned the tables and snooped back. His heart gave a painful thunk, his presence enveloped in a warmth he could remember fleetingly from childhood. Rey had been preparing not just a place to sleep for the night, but the closest approximation to a home he'd known.

 

Her plan to divide them had been discarded, a nest for two made with his personal possessions laid on the side of the bed he favoured, in the order he preferred. Most of Luke's personal things she'd moved to another hut, making room for the Jedi text, one of the ships pad, and a power source, so he could work on them if he was so inclined. The food bubbling over the hearty fire was a ration mix, the one he thought least objectionable. She'd arranged everything around his preferences.

 

_ "Rey," _  he breathed into her mind,  _ "what have you done." _

 

He felt her shy smile. It set his feet moving of their own accord towards his partner and the oasis she'd created.

 

_ "I'm happy you're here with me. I wanted you to feel welcome." _

 

A little home for her little family, even if it was temporary.

 

He fell through the door, breathing hard from running. Rey's head peeked up from where she'd been checking on their supper. Her cheeks glowed in the firelight.

 

"Just what I needed," she said, taking the flowers from his hand. He expected her to put them in the small clay cup on the shelf, but instead she threw them in the pot, stirred, and tasted it.

 

"Better."

 

"Will it keep?" he asked, vocal intensity giving away his true meaning.

 

She took his hand, bringing him down to where she knelt by the hearth.

 

"This is where we left off here, isn't it?"

 

"Finger touching and heavy breathing? Yeah," he agreed.

 

"Think it'll be different than last time, through our bond?"

 

Kylo let his free hand fall softly onto the skin of her neck, a pulse running through them both. He splayed his fingers up into her loose hair, trying to master their trembling, trying to hide from himself the blood that had soaked into the dry skin.

 

"Yes," he whispered. Their first time had been fantasy and magic, surreal and facilitated by the Force. This, he expected, would be overwhelmingly real, inescapably present, something more raw and vulnerable.

 

"Think if we'd met in Niima market, a pilot and a scavenger, it could have been like this from the start?" Rey asked. "Two ordinary people?"

 

He made a noise of agreement, glancing at her. There wasn't a doubt in his mind that would have caught sight of the fierce slave and wanted to pursue her attention.

 

"I'd have left Jakku for you," she said, pressing her lips to his.

 

He pulled her in, feeling her muscles relax.

 

"I'd have stayed on Jakku for you," he answered.

 

Owning the galaxy had been a dream he'd been forced into. His needs were few, his dreams were small, and being warm and safe with Rey, loved, covered them all.


	19. Shaving

"You're absolutely failing at that," Rey observed, a basket of fish perched on her hip.

Kylo didn't turn from his crossed legged spot on the windy cliff edge, didn't move his face or mouth. On the back of his head his hair had been tied up with one of her leather cords into a short black ponytail.

I accept your offer of help," he said wryly. She could feel stings and sharp pains through the bond.

Setting down her burden, Rey took the flint scraper from Kylo. He'd broken it in such a way the blade was nearly transparently sharp, a crude razor.

He followed her fingers on his face, turning so she could sit beside him and examine his handiwork. Fine trails of blood ran from a dozen tiny cuts over his scar, and the difficult areas.

Deftly, Rey scraped his days of stubble off, wiping the little hairs on the damp grass.

"You know, with your hair tied up like that I can see a few grey hairs at your temple," she teased, stroking the faint silver threads with a finger.

"Old age isn't something I've expected to experience, so going grey in my thirties will have to do," he said carefully, so as not to disturb her work.

"I was afraid of growing old on Jakku. It usually meant starvation," Rey explained casually, swallowing down the sleepless nights she'd thought about it.

She cupped his face, her own centimetres away while she worked the delicate area over his lips.

_"There are few in the First Order who live past their middle years. We have young generals, young men in roles that should belong to someone with greater maturity and wisdom."_

"What about the stormtroopers? What are their retirement options?"

Kylo watched the wind tease some of Rey's hair out of her half up half down tie. There were no traces of grey in her warm sandy mane.

_"You're usually cannon fodder for easy disposal. Hux' thought was that if you've outlived your usefulness why keep feeding you. Why send an expensive droid to see what's in that dangerous jungle full of predators, we can just send a single geriatric trooper with a comm."_

"I don't suppose I need to state my disgust."

"Noted."

"Know any better stories? Ones that aren't about systematic murder? We've got time," Rey asked, lifting his jaw to get underneath.

"Just the usual bunch everyone knows. Kid stuff," Kylo dismissed, preening a little under the attention. "You?"

Rey smiled gently, running her fingers over the smooth flint.

 _So pretty, so dumb_ , she thought to herself lovingly.

"I heard that... No, you're right. So dumb. You don't know any those sorts of stories, do you. No one ever told you stories, you just overheard adults talking about adult things."

"I'm all ears," Rey stated, "if you feel like it."

Kylo pushed her hand away from his face and took both her hands.

_Folk tales, nursery rhymes, morality stories, myths, legends, books, popular holovids..._

"Sweetheart, I'm going to tell you all of them."

"Can we act some out with the porgs?"

"I'm already regretting this."

"C'mon."

"Are you worried about hurting them?"

"I'm careful, I'd never hurt anyone," Rey retorted with a frown.

Kylo pointed at the line down his face he was carefully avoiding with the flint.

"Alright, yes that."

He pointed at his shoulder.

"Alright."

He pointed at his hip.

"I would never hurt a _porg_."


	20. Overreacting

"You're overreacting," Kylo accused calmly.

"You're underreacting," Rey snapped, pulling her pants on and hastily reaching for her shirt.

"It's just us here. Maybe it was a trick of the firelight."

Kylo stayed planted in the middle of the blankets, no attempt to hide his nakedness. The fire was casting strange, long shadows around the curved walls of the dry stone hut.

"Really, Ben," Rey said sarcastically, slipping her clothes over her head, " _really_? We finish having sex and the firelight made a trick of the light that looked exactly like a blue Force ghost of Luke standing at the end of the bed?"

"That could be how your brain interpreted it. You were rather distracted, but it was just an ordinary flicker of light."

"And then the blue light shook its head and threw its hands up in the air?" she pointed out.

"Yeah, maybe," he answered, running a hand through his wild bedhead.

"And how do you explain Luke's voice saying, 'oh for fuck's sake'?"

"Wind."

Rey stood at the end of the bed with her hands on her hips, shaking her head.

"We are not doing any act of a remotely sexual nature on this island until I am one hundred percent certain your uncle isn't voyeuristically haunting us."

Kylo pulled the blanket over himself modestly, and raised his hands in a sign of sincerity.

"Rey, I swear to you that I am absolutely convinced that Skywalker's ghost will never appear." He let his belief in this pour through the bond to her, eyes wide and honest. She stormed outside. "-Again," he finished quietly.

"Skywalker," he hissed, eyes narrowing in anger, "what the fuck was that."

The blue ghost shone in the darkness, arms crossed, indignation clear on the transparent features. He was clean-shaved, his face youthful, but his eyes locked onto Kylo with a withering look.

"My apprentice, on my island, on my bed?"

"Alright, you cockblocking bastard, what will it take?"

Luke smirked.

"Name the first one after me or I will show up. Every. Single. Night."

"We'll leave the island."

"I can travel."

"You tried to kill me, we'll call it even."

"No, you trying to kill me made that even."

"I'll let Rey keep your lightsaber."

"Rey will make you let her keep my lightsaber."

"First male child. No Lukina's or Lukella's or anything.

"Deal."

"Deal. Now get the fuck out."

Luke vanished, an unsettling laugh lingering behind him.

"Agree, I did not," chuckled a croaky voice from nowhere.


	21. Milk

"You're going to like the taste of this blue milk, but don't ask where it came from because you- the fuck did you do, Ben?!"

 

Rey dropped her pack of bottles to the ground and stared past Kylo at the collapsed in charred remains of the sacred Jedi tree.

 

"I didn't do this," he said defensively, "it was like this when I got here."

 

"You're saying the tree just happened to burn down and fall over after thousands of years on it's own?"

 

"Yeah, I guess."

 

"And not because a powerful dark-sider with the destructive tantrums of a toddler suddenly showed up?"

 

"Yes, it had nothing to do wi-hey, I resent that!"

 

"You murdered someone  _yesterday _ ."

 

"Okay, but I didn't do  _this _ ."

 

Rey was silent a moment, thinking.

 

"No way did Luke do this," she said.

 

"Really? No way Luke Time-For-The-Jedi-To-End Skywalker Force blasted apart a sacred tree while he skipped off to certain death?"

 

"This seems dramatic for Luke. Luke wasn't dramatic. You're dramatic. This seems more you."

 

Kylo turned and put his hands on the shoulders of the diminutive woman frowning up at him. He brought his face down to her level so their eyes met.

 

"I swear on my lightsaber I did not eff up your magic tree."

 

Rey considered a moment then brightened.

 

"You're right, you'd have used your lightsaber if it were you."

 

Kylo swallowed down a wave of nausea.

 

"It's not working, remember?"

 

From Rey's struck expression he assumed she mostly certainly had not remembered.

 

"Let's see," she said, holding out her hand. He'd clipped it on out of habit before he'd gone to wander the island. She took it and tried the switch a few times.

 

"Oh, you're supposed to hit the  button," he said sarcastically.

 

"You're being an ass," she said calmly, fiddling with the wire. "It might have worked for me because I don't have all this," she waved absently at his whole person, "going on."

 

"I'm being an ass? You just accused me of destroying an ancient Jedi temple for no reason and with no motive, and then referenced the fact that I killed a man who had just destroyed five inhabited planets with a single command as an example of childish behaviour," he grumbled.

 

"Fair enough," she said, but he could tell her attention was entirely on the electronics before her. "There's no chance it's the casing or the wiring affecting it? You definitely think it's the kyber?"

 

He took her hand in his and wrapped it over and around where the stone sat.

 

"Feel it," he demanded.

 

Rey closed her eyes, focusing on the pulse of the stone. She recoiled slightly.

 

"It feels like it's been torn apart," she said, frowning.

 

"I finally pushed it too far," Kylo sighed, sinking down to sit on the stone step. Rey joined him, mind whirring away.

 

They watched a family of porgs waddle past.

 

"Why do you even have wings, lazy bastards," Kylo muttered at them.

 

"I think I can fix it, but you won't like it," Rey warned, chewing her lip.

 

He could feel her genuine trepidation. Trying to reassure her, he pulled Rey over to sit between his knees, her back to his chest, his arms encircling her.

 

"Give it to me," Rey said quietly.

 

"It's in your hands right now," Kylo retorted, confused.

 

"No, Ben, I mean forever. With no expectation of ever getting it back. Let me take care of it. We'll find you a new kyber, and when you think you're ready, make a new lightsaber."

 

It was like a punch to the gut. He blew out his breath, a roar in her ear. Resisting the urge to take the weapon back from her, he balled his fingers into fists. Rey felt tense in his arms, and he made the conscious decision to relax.

 

"I suppose," he said slowly, "I've already put myself in your hands while I sort myself out. Follows that it would be best for the sabre."

 

Plucking the handle from her unresisting grip, he reached down and clipped it onto her belt.

 

It felt final, digging into his thigh, still touching him, but his ownership lost.

 

_ Let go of the past. _

 

"I'll take care of it," Rey promised. Her tone was sweet, earnest, like when she'd once offered to help him turn.

 

Wanting to break the heaviness in the air before he changed his mind, Kylo reached out and grabbed one of Rey's dropped bottles. He tried a swig, swallowing around the lump in his throat.

 

"It's... unusual," he commented.

 

They sat together, drinking milk and staring at the meandering porgs. The parallel entreaty had occurred to her as well as Kylo.

 

"Do you know what occurred to me after we fought Snoke's guards together?" Rey said, nestling in, pretending her bottom wasn't becoming damp from the stone they sat on.

 

"Hm?" he prompted.

 

"All that talk of turning in the elevator, you'll turn, no you'll turn. The moment we were surrounded we both literally turned, so we could fight back to back together."

 

"You think we were being too figurative?"

 

She shrugged.

 

"Who knows. I'm here and not on base, and you're here and not picking out new curtains for the throne room. Maybe not."

 

He considered this, finishing his bottle.

 

"So where did you get this milk, and why don't I want to know?"


	22. Corellian Death Metal

"You think they don't like me."

"It's not that they don't like you, Rey, they just think you're disrespectful," Kylo said in a tone he felt was conciliatory. She scowled, and shoved him off the rock onto the wet grass.

"I blew one hole in one hut," she said mulishly.

He put his arm around her, watching the fishwives on the path below point at the pair. One reached up a hand and waved to Kylo. He lifted his palm to greet them, but when Rey brightened and gave them a cheery hello, they shook their head and chittered off.

"You're also the cause of the destruction of an entire hut," he reminded her.

When the had arrived on Ahch-To the little people had still been gathering up the far flung stones in their wheelbarrows. He'd endeared himself to them while Rey was fishing by using the Force to gather the blocks and rebuild the hut with an understated, elegant display of control over the Force. She'd returned with a slimy monster in a basket, and her partner a hero.

"That wasn't my fault," she said indignantly. "Luke blew it up because he saw you," she accused.

Kylo shrugged.

"They don't see it that way."

Rey leaned into his warmth, fuming.

"Did you wreck anything else last time?"

Rey bit her lip.

"One pillar of rock on the outcrop."

"And."

"And they may see me as being the reason the tree temple got destroyed, but that was Luke too!"

"Well, like you or not, we've been invited to their festival tonight, and seeing as we don't know how long we'll be here, it would be prudent not to antagonize the locals further."

"What do you mean, _further_."

  
X

  
Kylo cracked a sandy eye eighteen hours later, vision blurred and head pounding from the fish people's homemade liquor and a humiliating amount of dancing. His bed was warm, and he reached for the soft brown mass of Rey's hair for comfort.

"How are you doing, lightweight?" he murmured affectionately.

A terrifying Wookiee roar cleared his vision and sent adrenaline pulsing through his body. Uncle Chewie was stretched out beside him on his side, resting his head comfortably on one hand while he presumably watched Kylo sleep.

"Where's Rey, you shaggy bastard?" Kylo yelled, scrambling away and covering his lower half with the blanket.

_On the ship, brother's-child. It is time to go._

"Is she okay? You haven't hurt her."

_She is in far better shape than you. She is repairing the motivator with R2. We will leave soon. You have many scars now, child._

"You shot me." Kylo pulled on his clothes, and belted on Rey's blaster. The rest of the hut was empty already.

_You killed Han._

"How can we trust each other."

Chewie picked Kylo up like a kitten, by the back of his black jacket, and carted him out and down the stone steps. The height and swaying motion did nothing for Kylo's hangover, and he was in a truly foul mood by the time the Wookiee dropped him beside the landing gear of the Falcon.

Rey was whistling, bringing loads of porgs out of the ship and depositing the chirping stowaways onto the grass.

"Morning, Kylo!" she said cheerfully. "I enjoyed your dancing last night."

"How are you not sick right now?" he groaned.

"The fish people had little to spare for their least favourite visitor," she laughed, helping him up. He saw his lightsabre swinging from her waist. _Traitor_.

"Are we leaving?"

"We've been invited to rejoin the rebels, provided you're willing to give information on the First Order."

"Do I get a choice about this?"

"You can stay here with your new friends," she said, hands on hips. "Or you can have a long, awkward, uncomfortable ride with us now."

Seated in the back row of the Falcon's cockpit, aching to smack Poe Dameron on the back of the head for no reason, he found C-3PO next to him.

"Ben Solo! I have not seen you since you left to attend school with Master Luke! How are your studies progressing?"

Kylo stared into the soulless gold eyes, remembering his youth with the obnoxious but somehow endearing machine.

"Ben Override Command 163," he ordered C-3PO, wondering if his secret teenage subroutines were still active.

Loud Corellian death metal began to pour from C-3PO's vocal speaker. Everyone clapped their hands over their ears, shouting at the droid to stop the music. He shook his head, tapping the sides of his metal skull, indicating that he couldn't.

Kylo laughed like an asshole, and went to go find his old bunk for a nap.


	23. New Friends

"You won't believe this, but I haven't really done the friend thing before. I feel like you guys understand me though, you know?"

Kylo's voice was muffled by the elbow he'd thrown over his face to block out the lights above the Falcon's main bunk. Flat on his back, sulky as all get out, he was keenly aware of his descent back into his personal teenage hell.

"One day you're ordering people around, supreme leader of an empire, and the next you're the extra baggage, your cool girlfriend's unwanted plus one.

"I don't even have a lightsaber, guys. At least in my teens I could fuck some shit up with a laser sword."

"Uh, Kylo?" Rey asked from the doorway. "Are you... talking to the porgs?"

"We're friends now, Rey. They get me."

A soft chirrup sounded as a bird lost its footing on the bed frame and fell on his face.

"Careful, Gary," Kylo muttered, sweeping the bird aside. "It's a good thing I'm permanently unarmed."

"That fishwife liquor really fucked you up, eh?" Rey said sympathetically, dropping a kiss on his forehead. "No wonder you don't drink." She smoothed his hair and soothed his mind with gentle touches, lulling him into a peaceful state of forgetting where he was.

C3PO and R2D2 rolled into the little bedroom, the gold droid finally restored to order.

"Master Solo, how extraordinary to see you on that bed after all this time. To think that you were conceived on that very mattress, it seems like yesterday to my old circuits."

Kylo began to suspect the droid was after revenge. He sat up, cringing internally. There's knowing something, and then there's being hit over the head with the knowledge of something.

Rey turned her back to C3PO and mouthed the word "apologize" to Kylo.

"You don't say, old prissy pants."

Rey made an unimpressed expression.

"Why yes, Master Solo, in fact I believe R2D2 has security footage of that night stored in his memory banks, don't you R2?"

The blue and white droid gave a whistle and a squeak meaning something along the lines of "leave me out of this".

"Ben's sorry about earlier," Rey said hastily, putting a conciliatory hand on R2D2 that happened to cover its projector.

"We have many memories of your parents, and you Master Ben, stored in our hard drives," the gold droid threatened pleasantly. "Perhaps Miss Rey would be interested in some of your early poetry? Or the story of the time you could not reduce a youthful penile erection without extensive masturbation? I can still retrieve the holo vid records from the ship's main computer in case Miss Rey is interested in what you viewed to aid your efforts."

"I get it, 3PO," Ben snapped. "Truce?"

He got off the bed and walked over to the droid, his arms extended like he was offering a hug. Quirking an eyebrow, Rey couldn't puzzle out the wave of calm that had filled her partner's mind as he embraced the annoying robot.

The was a snap, a whir, then C3PO's head fell forward, his eyes blank.

"Did you switch him off?" Rey accused.

Hefting the droid over his shoulder, Ben smirked.

"Tin can has a date with the cargo hold."

He strode past the small droid, chuckling to himself, too distracted to notice the slim metal wand protrude from the white metal casing. It crackled with electricity as it neared the tall man's backside.

ZAP


	24. Mother's Curse

"You're going to have a child exactly like yourself, Ben Solo," General Organa yelled in exasperation, pointing at her son. "Consider it my curse!"

Rey frowned at the tiny irate princess from across the board room where they'd held Ben's disastrous and loud first meeting with his mother.

"With all due respect, General, please don't do that to me."

Leia shook her head at the Jedi, scorn plain in her beautiful features.

"Rey..." she trailed off, rubbing her temple. "Your judgement in everything else is so sound."

"Wait, I resent that," Ben accused, turning his body sharply to Rey. "I resent all of this."

"I could do without this," Rey waved at all of him, "in a small child I'm responsible for keeping alive."

"He tell you about the time we caught him running naked with Han's drill as a toddler?" Leia warned.

Rey sighed.

"Fuck, I'm doomed. Should have fallen for some sweet simpleton."

"I tried that," Leia said dryly, "look how that turned out."

"Hey!"

Realizing no one cared that he was offended, Ben tried to stir the pot.

"We'll have a little dark-haired boy Jedi first, little baby Luke," he said with saccharine sweetness.

"You hated Luke."

"I have my reasons."

"Such as?"

"His Force ghost blackmailed me?"

"I fucking knew it, Ben Solo!" Rey stood, enraged. She shimmered with energy, her eyes sparking as they focused on her lover. "You tried to gaslight me into thinking it was my imagination but I fucking knew he was watching us in his bed."

Leia slipped out of the room, not wanting to hear more. Somehow she knew Rey was about to be more persuasive in curbing Ben's bad attitude than any effort his mother could contribute.

"Ma'am," Poe acknowledged from where he leaned against the wall across from the door. His blaster was loose in its holster, his hand resting not-so-casually on it as he'd stood guard on the long meeting.

A swell of angry voices rose from behind the door Leia was closing.

"Rey okay in there?"

They both jumped back as a red lightsaber blade plunged through the door and was quickly retracted.

Leia cautiously crouched to look through the smoking hole. Rey was brandishing Ben's lightsaber against him, screaming like a hawk, while he apologized profoundly from behind the hovering table he'd maneuvered with the Force as a shield.

"Yes, she's fine. She's going to do just fine," Leia said proudly.


End file.
